June 10, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Jill Biden’s Creepy Edith Wilson 2.0 Moment Has Arrived. “While I was loathe to make any predictions about politics last year, there was one thing that I was sure of: Joe Biden would never really be President of the United States. I doubt any of the 700 trillion nonillion people who allegedly voted for this drooling puppet ever believed that he’d be doing any of the actual president stuff.”

June 9, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Let’s Play a Game of ‘If Hunter’s Last Name Were Trump.’ “The current occupier of the Oval Office has a straight-up sleazebag of a son running around out there who the press keeps ignoring. The Democratic propagandists masquerading as journalists must all be suffering a host of orthopedic ills from turning so forcefully away from each new Hunter Biden exhibit of scumbaggery.”

June 8, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Biden’s Rabid Trump Reversal Fever Is Bad for America. “It’s no secret that the Democrats were broken by their hatred for Trump. It’s a real sickness though if they need to pretend that peace in a historically war-torn region isn’t a good thing. Objectively, the Abraham Accords are something to be celebrated. Being so consumed by partisan bile that they can’t acknowledge them is not a good look for Biden or the Democrats.”

June 7, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Must See TV — Speaker of the House Donald J.Trump. “There is precedent for this. John Quincy Adams spent 17 years in the House of Representatives after serving one term as president. Trump could probably win a seat rather easily. It would be endless fun watching him shake things up on Capitol Hill. The Never Trump surrender monkey Republicans would drown in tears.”

June 4, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Kill Your Facebook. “Facebook was a primary driver of the nonsense that Fauci was spouting. Maybe the primary driver. The platform has almost three billion users and wields a kind of power we’ve not witnessed in media before.”

June 3, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The Fauci Fraud Is Now Plain for All to See. “Yeah, almost everything since March of 2020 has been irritating. I’ve had a sneaking suspicion all along, however, that a lot of the nutjobs like me would eventually be vindicated. That’s not an easy thing to hope for when up against a mainstream press that now does nothing but lie for a living, but I knew that this clown car we’ve been watching for 17 months wasn’t built for the long haul.”

June 2, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: I’m Tired of President Idiot Boy Calling Me a Terrorist. “It’s not big secret that Joe Biden has the IQ of toe cheese. He was a blithering idiot even before this blank-eyed, empty-headed Biden incarnation we’re being subjected to came on the scene. America is now suffering under a lethal combination of Biden’s natural stupidity and the fact that his diminished capacity makes him so easily manipulated by the false narrative pimps. Some of the most awful people in the land can make the President of the United States lie about anything.”

Of course, Biden has always been so willing.

June 1, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Newt Gingrich Is Trump’s Latest Brilliant Move to Troll Dems. “Much to the chagrin of the Romney/Cheney/Ryan surrender wing of the GOP, Trump remains a major player in Republican politics from Mar-a-Lago. He’s not going to go away, and most Republicans don’t want him to.”

May 31, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Memorial Day 2021—Remembering the Fallen. “Because so many have mentally checked out when it comes to Memorial Day, it’s incumbent upon those of us who haven’t to redouble our efforts to remind people. And to spend some extra quiet time ourselves reflecting on the unfathomable price so many great patriots have paid for us to be able to enjoy freedom. We have the luxury of being frivolous because they weren’t.”

May 28, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Anthony Fauci Is Unhinged, Untrustworthy, and Unqualified. “Only in a — you guessed it — bloated bureaucracy can someone who screws up on such a grand scale be given even more power even though there was no indication that he learned anything from earlier mistakes.”

May 27, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Democrats’ Pre-Election Lies Are Unraveling. “We entered a truly disturbing and bizarre phase where the American mainstream media was willing to take at face value any claims made by agents of the Chinese Communist Party all the while rejecting and denigrating anything that was said by the President of the United States. It was a new low even for that group of professional bottom-dwellers.”

May 26, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Biden’s Only Real Success as President Is Really Trump’s. “Once more, with feeling: the Biden kinda/sorta presidency thus far is an unmitigated disaster. True, there are partisans out there who are so invested in hating Donald Trump that they’re willing to tell themselves otherwise but that doesn’t change reality. We call these people unwell. Harsher terms could be used, but I’m in a generous mood today. We’ll get back to referring to them as bottom-feeding participants in a moronic mass delusion tomorrow.”

May 24, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: New East Berlin Alert—Oregon Requiring Vaccine Passports. “Many might dismiss this by saying that it’s only one state, but I think we all know how this story plays out. There are many people in this country who’ve fallen in love with COVID oppression and it’s a safe bet that we’ll see liberal states and cities turning into New East Berlins and requiring citizens to show their papers to enjoy basic freedoms in public. As we are all painfully aware, liberals aren’t exactly known for governmental restraint.”

May 21, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Mainstream Media Is OK With Biden’s Russia Collusion. “The formerly Russia-obsessed mainstream media has now lost all curiosity about any possible buddy-buddy action between the president and Moscow. Maybe the hacks are exhausted from the three years they spent writing all of that fiction during Trump’s time in office.”

May 20, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: I Won’t Mind If Nancy Pelosi Wears a Mask Forever. “The Democrats have apparently stopped following the science. Not only that, they’re done worshiping at the altar of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), an organization that we’ve been told for over a year speaks nothing but the Gospel truth. It’s not as if I’m surprised by the flip-flopping. People who wander through life unburdened by morals, convictions, or the cognitive ability to process logic aren’t exactly known for their consistency, after all.”

May 19, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Kyrsten Sinema Goes Full Pro-Israel, Democrats Weep. “The real fringe of the Democratic party is my senior senator, Kyrsten Sinema. She’s not clinically insane, so she’s not in the mainstream of the party.”

May 18, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Why Are We Still Pretending That Andrew Cuomo Isn’t a Moron? “Frequent fodder here at the Briefing during this time has been the bumbling gubernatorial triumvirate of Gavin Newsom, Gretchen Whitmer, and Andrew Cuomo. Make no mistake, I would love to be able to stop writing about them but they just won’t go away. Few people have benefited more from a toxic combination of liberal media bias and the participation trophy era than these three. The fact that they’re all still employed is kind of stunning when you think about it. Back when this country had more backbone shame would have made each of them tuck tail and resign.”

May 17, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Israel Could Use a Real American President Right Now. “The world certainly does seem to be unraveling during this time that the United States is going without a grown-up president, doesn’t it? I don’t know about all of you, but I thought it was super cool when Donald Trump was president and there was peace in the Middle East. We were enjoying those halcyon days mere months ago, but it seems like years.”

May 14, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Biden Needs To Stop the COVID Vaccine Harassment Already. “The relentless mask/vaccine one-note messaging from the Biden administration is getting more wearisome by the minute. There are other things going on in the world that the empty husk’s handlers should be making him pretend to deal with.”

Look around. It’s all they have.

May 13, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The GOP Isn’t In Turmoil, It’s Growing the Hell Up. “There was a lot to choose from when pondering what to lead off with this morning. I was tempted to write about Ol’ Gropes again but, as I said, I’m sober. I want to stay that way a while longer. I will give brief mention to a rather disturbing post that Tyler wrote, however. It details the fact that 124 retired generals and admirals have confirmed our worst nightmare: the current President of the United States of America is a drooling moron who is mentally unfit to deal with a military crisis.”

May 12, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Everything Is Fine—Biden Naps While World Falls Apart. “The world doesn’t do well with a weak leader in the United States. It does even worse with one who disappears. Forget having the stamina to be president, Biden doesn’t seen to have the stamina to watch television for a few minutes after dinner.”

May 10, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: What Are Democrats So Afraid of in Maricopa County? “There’s been a lot of recent drama about the audit that’s been going on in Maricopa County. The Democrats have been trying to shut it down and not having much success so far. They are persistent little buggers though, and now they’re upping their game.”

May 4, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: States Continue to Not Buy Into Biden’s Commie New World Order. “The Masked Biden Fetish Brigade would have us all believe that the majority of the citizens of this country are thrilled with everything the administration is up to. What we’re seeing out in the hinterlands doesn’t quite bear that out, however.”

April 30, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The Border Nightmare Is Team Biden’s Only ‘Accomplishment.’ “During his masked fetish party speech the other night our national embarrassment never really got around to the border crisis that he’s created. I’m fully aware that liberals in America don’t care about border issues, especially those who live far, far away from Mexico. I live 60 miles from the Mexican border though, so it’s kind of a big deal here.”

April 29, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Biden’s Joint Session Mask Fetish Party Was Totally Creepy. “The mask virtue signaling in a room full of socially-distanced people who are all vaccinated was pathetic. It was also proof that the big idea, big government Dems know that they really have nothing going on and they have to keep the public distracted by the COVID panic porn.”

April 28, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Americans Waking Up to Fact That Kamala Harris Is An Idiot. “Because nothing matters anymore and Joe Biden has the IQ of cheap vodka, he decided that the best person to back up his puppet presidency was the woman who the Democrats couldn’t wait to get rid of less than a year earlier.”

April 27, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: John Kerry Is a Treasonous Idiot Who Needs to Be Perp-Walked.

April 26, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Mainstream Media Poll Dances to Pretend Biden Is Doing Well. “That’s right, the drooling puppet president who has been perma-fluffed by the mainstream media is beating the guys the MSM hated but not anyone else. How awful do you have to be to not get a better boost from the media lust than Grandpa Gropes has gotten?”

April 23, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Critical Race Theory and the Death of Public Education. “The mask is off (COVID-era pun intended), the pretense that they want to enrich the minds of young Americans with real knowledge has been abandoned. Biden and Mrs. Dr. Jill want to start minting mindless automatons who are convinced that America is awful.”

April 22, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Trump’s Biggest Failure Was In Not Gutting the FBI. “An avowed leftist unloads over a hundred rounds aimed at a gathering of Republicans and the FBI thinks his motive was that he was just looking for a way to off himself. A citizen not in law enforcement who’s only watched cop shows on television knows that this doesn’t fit the ‘suicide by cop’ definition.”

And what happened on January 6 was no “insurrection,” but whatever definition helps push the Left’s narrative is the correct definition.

April 21, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Chauvin Guilty but Unhinged Leftists Still Complain. “Another chapter closed in the tragic George Floyd saga yesterday but I think we all know that it won’t be the final chapter. This is going to be an American societal horror version of Proust’s In Search of Lost Time and we’re only about one-third of the way through the first of the seven books.”

April 20, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: I’ve Known Maxine Waters Is Evil for a Very Long Time. “Blaming ‘rhetoric’ for violence has long been their thing. These are the lunatics who tried to blame a target on political literature for Jared Loughner shooting Gabby Giffords, after all. In their tiny minds, however, it’s only Republicans who have inflammatory rhetoric. They’ve been lying about Trump since Jan. 6th and now they’re running cover for Waters’s actually inflammatory words.”

April 19, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The United States Should Soon Reach Fauci Immunity. “Our idiot president is often seen wearing two masks even though he’s immune now. If Fauci has his way, we will be wearing masks until we’re all too old to care.”

April 15, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Democrats to America—Screw You, We Wanna Expand SCOTUS. “They’ll tell you that that’s not really what they’re up to but they’ve been talking about ‘transformation’ ever since The Lightbringer got into office in 2009. What they want to transform the country into won’t be America anymore. I wouldn’t be surprised to find that they’ve got a secret list of new names for the place. They’re probably mad that Soviet Socialist Republics has already been used.”

April 14, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Project Veritas Confirms CNN Is a Cesspool of Biased Lies. “CNN’s lying about Trump being mentally and physically unfit to be in office led to the United States now having a president who is mentally and physically unfit to be in office.”

April 13, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: U.S.May Want to Look Into Getting Rid of Minnesota. “Hear me out. I know that we have all gotten used to the way the American flag looks and that change is difficult but, let’s be honest here, we could all probably get used to having fewer stars on it. Maybe start by removing one after we rid ourselves of, say, Minnesota. I’m done with it. Minnesota and its 10,000 lakes need to go somewhere that isn’t here.”

April 12, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: John Boehner Reminds Conservatives Why We Didn’t Like Him. “Johnny Boozesweat can revise this history all he wants but the simple fact of the matter is this: he only became Speaker because the Tea Party movement formed in 2009 to save the GOP from itself.”

April 9, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Biden the Uniter Wants To Trample Your 2nd Amendment Rights. “Democrats hate most of the Bill of Rights. They will insist that they don’t, but they’re forever betrayed by their actions. Now they’ve got a president who never really knows what he’s saying and he’s openly admitting that they don’t have any respect for the Constitution. Now that that cat is out of the bag, there’s really nothing to keep their assault on various rights from getting bolder. In olden times, Dems would be somewhat coy about such things. Now they’re in full YOLO mode.”

Related: Will Biden Declare a ‘Public Health Crisis’ to Grab Your Guns?

April 8, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Infrastructure and the Dems’ Concussed Commie Fever Dream. “With the Democrats it’s all about the feels. Burdensome things like economics, definitions of words, or common sense need never be considered as long as they can tug some heartstrings. They have mastered the politics of emotion in order to shame anyone who disagrees with their outrageous boondoggles.”

April 7, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Reject the Fauci Fetish Perma-Pandemic Panic Porn. “What really makes me dislike the guy, however, is the fact that he obviously doesn’t want anybody to feel better, at least emotionally. I wrote in mid-February that Fauci and Co. were going to start using ‘variants’ as an excuse to keep us cowering and miserable, despite the fact that more and more of us are getting vaccinated.”

April 5, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: It’s Official—Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Is Utterly Useless. “AOC is the epitome of all that is wrong with the digital, social media age. She has the IQ of a baboon’s armpit but has become the gold standard of Democratic politics because she’s made herself social media famous. If you’re of the opinion that a big Twitter presence carries some kind of street cred, that’s cool. If you’re hanging out in the real world, here is the deal about AOC: she’s a paste eater’s paste eater.”

April 2, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Biden and His Idiot Supporters Are Trying to Cancel Georgia. “The kicker here is that Atlanta is the Democratic stronghold in Georgia. The cancel animals are so rabid that they don’t care that they are advocating for the economic punishment of their political comrades. The woke scolds continue to redefine absurdity.”

The new unity looks an awful lot like the old enforced conformity.

April 1, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: LOL Words Don’t Mean Anything and Everything Is Racist Now. “I’m convinced that America’s dumbest bartender doesn’t know the meanings of half of the words she uses. Fortunately for her, the people who vote for her are even dumber than she is. All she has to do is steal somebody’s Word of the Day calendar and she can dazzle them with nonsensical things like it’s not a surge because they’re not insurgents. I wouldn’t be shocked to find that they toddler-proof the electrical outlets in her office.”

March 31, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Teachers’ Unions Are Heading for the Ninth Circle of Hell. “Apparently, it’s only American children who are going to give teachers the Wuhan Bat Flu and the randos who illegally cross the border are granted some sort of magical immunity by the Fauci Fairy.”

March 30, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Barely Coherent Biden Is Still Babbling About Mask Mandates. “Democrats, however, find it impossible to resist the urge to have the government in control of every aspect of our lives. They’re really creepy that way. They can’t wrap their heads around the thought of the citizens doing the right thing without being threatened by bureaucratic tyrants. Kinda makes you wonder what kind of people they really are if they think of others that way.”

March 29, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Everything Democrats Say About Georgia Election Law Is a Lie. “Speaking of absurdity, the Democrats’ reign of error when it comes to what actually constitutes election integrity continues to rage on incoherently. This isn’t really new territory for the Democrats — they’ve been lying about Republicans and voting for years. However, as with all things during the President Puppet era, their lies are getting bigger and louder now.”

March 25, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Harris Takes Over Border Mess as Biden Carries Out Perfect Bloodless Coup Against Himself. “There is a palpable sense that even those who are enjoying controlling the government through him know that this gig has an extremely limited shelf life. They seem to be resigned to the fact that they’ll be exhausted by trying to keep up the pretense that Ol’ Gropes is in charge of anything. They may as well get people used to seeing Harris hold the reins. Poor Joe probably doesn’t even know that he just participated in a coup to replace him.”

March 24, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Fact-Checkers Are Not Going to Like This MIT Story About Origins of That Virus From You-Know-Where. “Some prominent scientists and researchers are calling into question both the wet market theory and the notion that the China virus transnational, post-racial, non-sectarian virus accidentally escaped from a lab in W&*%n, a city in no particular geographic region.”

March 22, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Today We’re Gonna Party Like It’s 2019. “Colorado has 3,000 people a day applying for background checks,” I was told. “The backlog is pretty bad.”

March 19, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Time To Tell Idiot King Biden That He’s Awful At His Job. “The topic at hand is that I’m really tired of the puppet show’s occupation of the White House. A lucid Joe Biden would have been a big enough nightmare as president. The people who are controlling the empty, babbling shell that resembles Joe Biden really seem to be intent on hastening the demise of the American experiment.”

March 18, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Ron DeSantis Is the Perfect Antidote To Republican Squishism. “This is a most opportune time to reflect upon what DeSantis has accomplished this past year since it’s the first anniversary of the world’s plunge into the COVID madness. For much of that year, the American mainstream media regaled us with stories about their Holy Trinity of American governors: Democrats Andrew Cuomo, Gretchen Whitmer, and Gavin Newsom. Per the MSM, virtually every move each made was redefining real leadership. When they did write about DeSantis, it was to say that he had blood on his hands for keeping his state open.”

March 17, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: President Puppet Finally Schedules a Press Conference. “There is something deliciously Biden-esque about the announcement coming so many days before the event. It’s like they are basically admitting that he needs a lot of prep time to take a few softball questions. We’re not really going to believe that the press corps is going to grill Biden with serious questions, are we? Maybe they’ll go the Obama route and ask him what he’s found most enchanting about the presidency so far.”

Flashback: With a handful of days until the election, press asks Biden, ‘What flavor milkshake did you get?’

March 16, 2021

YES. NEXT QUESTION? Did Biden Establish the Military’s First ‘Virtue Signal’ Corps?

March 15, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Military Brass Bravely Launch Operation Tucker Carlson. “Not even eight weeks of Biden and members of the military are turning on a private citizen because he offended their delicate sensibilities. Is there nothing about America this drooling idiot can’t ruin?”

March 12, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The COVID Panic Porn Freaks Need to Be Shamed and Silenced. “Even the states that have experienced the most onerous lockdowns are beginning to open up. Sure, New York and California are only doing it because their governors are both neck deep in trouble, but it’s still happening. What’s stunning to those of us on the pro-freedom side of things is that so many people still want to be miserable.”

March 11, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Democrat/Labor Alliance Is a Commie Nightmare for America. “Private sector union membership has been cratering for a very long time. Public sector unions (which should be illegal) are doing all right, especially in states with no right-to-work laws. Union membership only thrives with coercion. This bill is one big strong arm play.”

March 9, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The Woke Liberal Assault On Female Athletes Is A Travesty. “There are very few things in politics anymore that get me angry. For those new to the Briefing, I actually wrote a book about not letting politics get to me. Today, however, I’m going to go over one of the few things that does bring me close to a boiling point: the Democrats’ transgender fetish, specifically as it applies to women’s athletics.”

March 8, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Trump Informs GOP Higher-Ups That It’s Still His Party. “As The Hill article noted, this seems to be an attempt by Trump to ‘solidify his standing as a top kingmaker in the GOP.’ ‘The’ top kingmaker would be more like it. Who else in the Republican party has that kind of power? The MSM hacks are still lost in a dreamland where they think the Romney wing of the party is respected and has some clout.”

March 5, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: California Is Lost, Getting Rid of Newsom Won’t Save It. “I’ve been writing for years that conservatives should never get too excited about getting Democrats we don’t like out of office because there is almost always someone worse waiting in the wings as a replacement. It’s almost guaranteed that whomever would replace Newsom would be another Democrat, and that’s not a pretty sight in California.”

March 4, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Democrats’ HR 1 Is a Force Multiplier for Election Fraud. “This is a dangerous, naked federal power grab that would put quite a few nails in the coffin of the good old Republic. It would also make it nigh on impossible to clean up any of the very real messes that need to be dealt with. Dealt with at the state level, that is. HR 1 is like using a machete to close up a wound that needs a tourniquet. It’s not a cure, it’s an exacerbation of the problem.”

March 3, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Who Had ‘Dr. Seuss Is Racist’ On Their Cancel Bingo Cards? “Most forms of entertainment are reflective of the time they were created and there’s a lot of older stuff out there that the woke scolds find problematic because none of them understand context. Disney Plus has been putting warnings on classic movies and cartoons like Dumbo because somebody might have a feeling hurt while watching it. Heck, pretty much everything that was written or filmed before 1965 is probably suspect now. I’m reading a classic sci-fi anthology that’s mostly stuff from first half of the 20th century and it’s a minefield of words that would be deemed culturally inappropriate now. Does that mean these old stories by luminaries in the genre have no value anymore?”

March 2, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Happy Texas Independence Day! Will Woke History Cancel the Alamo? “As we hit the 185th anniversary of Texas Independence and the fall of the Alamo, then the rise of Texas, we have a problem. Some are revising the story to put slavery front and center, when it was not. It was an issue, but not the primary issue. The Texas State Historical Association’s chief historian wants us to forget the Alamo and view its defenders — and their supporters now — as racists. Walter Buenger, PhD and TSHA chief historian, recently slammed the Alamo as an insignificant battle then and a monument to white supremacy now. The facts don’t support that at all. ”

Proud Texan Bryan Preston is filling in today while Kruiser shakes off a birthday hangover.

(Bumped.)

March 1, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The Trump Comeback Has Begun. “If you thought the Left went ape-stuff crazy the first time Trump did this, by 2024 the bat-guano is really gonna hit the fan.”

February 26, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: ‘Equality Act’ Is Proof Democrats Are Clinically Insane. “The Equality Act also gives federal protection to male athletes who want to identify as female and compete in women’s sports. My daughter was a college athlete, and this is a topic I first wrote about two years ago. This ridiculous kowtowing to a fringe of a fringe of the population is an outrage and an embarrassment. The party that fashions itself as the champion of women hates and disrespects female athletes.”

February 23, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Let’s Stop Pretending That Union Teachers Are Saints. “The unions have been delaying the reopening of schools by demanding a variety of things that don’t have anything to do with educating your children. And despite the fact that there is SCIENCE proving that school kids aren’t spreading the ‘rona, teachers are acting as if they’re marching to their deaths if they go back into the classrooms.”

February 19, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Trump Derangement Syndrome Hits Pathetic New Low. “Now that the Democrats have failed to keep Trump from running for president again they’re living in abject terror of him returning in 2024 and ruining their long term ugly designs on the United States. Couple that with the fact that they can’t really sing Biden’s praises and it’s easy to see that we’re in for a few more years of this snot bubble toddler fit of theirs.”

February 18, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Rush Limbaugh’s ‘No-Yield’ Authenticity Won’t Be Forgotten. “As has been noted by every person in conservative media since yesterday, we have a platform because of Rush Limbaugh. It’s so much more than just that though. Rush could have easily been the detached godfather of conservative media, and we would all be giving him props for that. But almost everyone on this side has a personal story about how Rush inspired or or motivated them.”

February 17, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: DeSantis ’24 Just To Break the COVID Panic Porn Tyrants. “DeSantis continues to make all of the right people angry, which as you know is a favorite criterion of mine for judging our elected officials. DeSantis has been flying in the face of the liberal hypocrisy orthodoxy regarding whether schools should be open or not. Lib politicians are, of course, utterly beholden to the demands of teachers’ unions, who have been lobbying hard to get paid, get vaccinated, and not return to work.”

January 19, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Trump’s Last Full Day—What a Long, Strange Trip It’s Been. “From a personal perspective, I’ll tell you what I said on my podcast that will be posted later today: the overwhelming relief of not having to endure a Hillary Clinton presidency is something that I have been grateful for every day since Trump took the oath of office. It’s also made it all worth it. This great nation really dodged a bullet when Trump stunned the world and banished Granny Maojackets to Chappaqua to spend her days cracking open boxes of Franzia and pulling the wings off of flies.”

January 14, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Your All-Too-Frequent Reminder That Jake Tapper Is Filth. “There were many like Tapper who use to be more coy about their bias but Trump forced them to peel off their human masks and reveal their biased lizard alien faces.”

January 13, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Squish Republican Turncoats Are More Vile Than Democrats. “They’re pathetic emotional midgets who are desperate for attention. If they became full time Democrats, they’d just be one in a big crowd. If they remain Republican, they’ve got an easy, albeit brief, attention fix. Whenever their fellow Republicans need them, all they have to do is slip a shiv in their backs and they get a pure hit of New York Times love for a few days.”

January 8, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Your Weekly Reminder That the Democrats Are Still Awful. “Yeah, they’re all on their high horses after Wednesday, pretending that they are peace-loving and the bringers of unity to the Republic, but we’re actually reaping the seeds that they’ve sown. Unrest has been the leftist modus operandi for a very long time but it has greatly escalated during President Trump’s time in office. They hit the streets and filled their diapers almost the second after he was elected in 2016. And they never let up.”

January 6, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The Real 2020 Plague Is This Election That Never Ends. “For just a little while last night I was hoping that I would have something definitive to share with you about the Georgia runoff elections by the time I put this Briefing to bed for publication. A pipe dream, I know, but if I ever stop being a dreamer it will be a quick trip to standing in line at the grocery store buying nothing but discount vodka and cat food.”

Related: Results still coming in.

January 5, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Can the Democrats Start 2021 With Another Stolen Election? “The Peach State was rife with ‘irregularities’ during the general election. My biggest fear is that there hasn’t been enough time to figure it what all of them were yet. And if there is a way to game the system and get a pro-abortion, cop-hater elected to the United States Senate from Georgia, the Democrats will have figured it out.”

January 4, 2021

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Incoherent Granny Boxwine Reelected As House Speaker. “The fun got rolling on Sunday when the vote for Speaker of the House of Representatives. was held. The Party of Youth and Diversity demonstrated its bold vision for the future by sticking with the 80-year-old white lady.”

December 31, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Alec Baldwin’s Phony Wife Is An SNL Skit Waiting to Happen. “Over here in the comedy trade, Joe Biden is a target rich joke environment the likes of which hasn’t been seen in the modern era. Sadly, mainstream comedy has been castrated by political correctness and pledged fealty to the Democratic party. Unless I can get back on stage soon, you’re not going to be hearing any jokes about Joe Biden. I don’t even do political comedy on stage, but I’d break my own rules just to have a go at this guy.”

The world has never needed Stephen Kruiser more than right now.

December 30, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Will the Left Media Ever Pay for Trump-Era Malpractice? “While Joe Biden’s almost five decades of lackluster time as a plagiarist/buffoon in Washington may have given him the name recognition to run for president, it was the vile behavior of the American mainstream media that helped him perpetrate the greatest fraud in American electoral history. The double-whammy of the MSM lying about President Trump and lying for the senile idiot in the basement made it easier for the Dems to pull off the Magic Mail-In 80 Million Vote circus.”

December 29, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Barstool Sports Brings Small Biz Relief to 2020 Misery. “I’ve maintained throughout the year that I truly believe that the lockdowns are deliberately trying to ruin small businesses because small business owners aren’t a reliable voting bloc for Democrats. One of the few good things to emerge from all of the pandemic horse you-know-what is that we’ve been rediscovering (and finding new) ways of helping businesses and private citizens.”

December 28, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Happy Monday Kids — COVID Gonorrhea Is Here. “I’m so full of conspiracy theories lately — what else are you going to when sitting a home all the time — that I’m willing to believe that some mad scientist is really behind the Super Clap. It was either that, or somebody was tempting fate by insisting that nothing else could possibly go wrong in 2020.”

December 23, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: We Need a Vaccine to Save Us From Bipartisan ‘Relief’ Bills. “There’s the thing — all of the media chatter about this has been referring to it as a COVID relief bill. Yes, we’re all aware that this is how these spending bills get done. That’s the problem though, isn’t it? This little pork dance just gets worse with each new spending bill. Ninety-nine percent of the people who get elected to the House or Senate immediately become afflicted with brain damage that renders them incapable of understanding the meaning of ‘fiscal responsibility’.”

December 22, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Will Gestapo Joe Make a Hard Run at Gun Owners Right Away? “It’s imperative to prepare for the system shock of an administration that has the potential to be such a nightmare that conservatives will be longing for the relatively happy days of the Obama administration. Biden is bringing back a lot of the flacks from the Lightbringer Era, and they all seem to be itchy to get working on unfinished business from the first go-round. In fact, you could say that a lot of them are probably looking at this as Obama’s third term. It’s not like the empty vessel Biden is possessed of any great original vision, and he is a pathological plagiarist.”

December 21, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Welcome to the Miserable Soviet Vaccine Mandate Hell. “Let me be clear: I’m pulling for every version of the COVID-19 vaccine that’s approved. I want these things to work so that we might be able to get back to living somewhat normal lives again. At least that’s how I would prefer it all work out. It’s beginning to look like the availability of the vaccine might just be a continuation of the dystopian freak show we’ve been living in.”

December 16, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Americans Revolt Against Life in COVID-19 East Berlin. “As I write this, my hometown is under curfew from 10 PM to 5 AM. There is no logic or science to back this up as being in any way effective to combat the ‘rona, but many ‘Listen to scientists’ Democrats are fond of the curfews.”

December 15, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: WaPo Idiot Thinks Biden Is Head of the Church of England or Something. “To fulfill their lust for getting rid of ORANGE MAN BAD, the MSM was forced to install in the Oval Office an empty-head moron who can’t navigate three sentences without losing his ability to speak his native language. The poor dears who have to keep this charade afloat have to go way over the top to do so. They need to over-correct by making things up just so they can pretend that there is some ‘there’ there with Drooling Joe.”

December 14, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Apocalypse Soon—Brush Up On Your Mandarin for the Biden Years. “The tangled, dysfunctional relationship that we have with China right now has been kept in check during the Trump years. The media’s October cover-up has now practically given the CCP a seat at Cabinet meetings.”

December 11, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Another Middle East Trump Triumph for the Media to Ignore. “This is how utterly despicable the journalist class has become. What President Trump has accomplished diplomatically this year should be celebrated by all Americans. It takes a special kind of emotional stunting to not be able to admit that. The MSM is so riddled with Trump Derangement Syndrome that it can’t praise an accomplishment of his even when they think that they’re about to kick him out of the door.”

December 8, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Trump Can’t Allow Democrats To Enjoy One Minute of Biden ‘Victory.’ “The Democrats and their flying monkeys in the media are still rending their garments over the fact that Trump and the faithful will not go quietly into Inauguration Day, which you all know I’m a fan of. Watching them flail throughout what should be their extended moment of triumph is rather delightful. I didn’t used to be this mean-spirited about politics but after what they did for the last four years I find myself a bit bereft of any charitable feelings for the Dems.”

December 7, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Trump Flexes His Rally Muscle In GA and It Is GLORIOUS. “This was Trump at his finest. He IS the Republican party now and he knew that he had to do this. He’s suffering through the fact that China hooked up with the Democrats (yeah, I really believe this) to steal an election from him but he’s still out there swinging for the fences.”

December 1, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Whaddyaknow — Enemy of the People CNN Finally Admits China Lied About Bat Flu. “To say that CNN is a little late to the party on this one would be doing things with the word ‘understatement’ that are probably illegal in thirty countries. I know this year seems like it’s been a decade long, but I can still remember way back to last summer, when the bulk of CNN’s ‘reporting’ involved chiding President Trump for repeatedly making the point that the coronavirus not only came from China, but that China was not at all forthcoming regarding the particulars of it. It was ‘racist’ to be honest about what was going on.”

Sometimes the Party requires 2+2=5, and at other times the Party requires 2+2=3.

November 9, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: The Comrade Biden Show Is Already Kinda Creepy. “For the longest time I thought that they’d be working on an exit plan for Biden the second the election was over. Many have wondered aloud if the Democrats are going to hit their own president with the 25th Amendment. Now I’m starting to think that they will probably keep the old boy around and have a few people playing the role of Edith Wilson in the background.”

October 19, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Big Tech Needs to Get Its Filthy, Biased Thumbs Off the Scale of This Election. “This heavy-handed, biased censorship by Twitter and Facebook is far more egregious and dangerous than any of the alleged ‘interference’ by Russia or China. The bitter irony is that it was the Russia nonsense that both platforms used as justification for their thought policing.”

September 28, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Amy Coney Barrett Is Making Liberal Heads Explode and It’s GLORIOUS. “The idea that the Democrats can suddenly stop on a dime and cease being the vile creatures they’ve become especially since 2017 seems a little far-fetched to me. These people are proud of their aberrant behavior. They are already in tantrum mode and that’s not going to get any better between now and the beginning of the hearing.”

August 26, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: RNC Night 2—FLOTUS Is Classier and More Attractive Than Any Democrat Alive. “You have to understand how remarkable this RNC is from the perspective of an activist who has been watching the GOP get in its own way for decades. It’s surprising and amusing to me that the Republicans have finally learned how to play the game of politics in a more functional manner after a non-politician became the party’s standard-bearer.”

July 30, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Never Trumpers Leg-Hump Every Leftist Narrative Just To Make Friends. “In reality, the Never Trump crowd is one of the least principled groups in the history of American politics, which is a truly bottom-feeding feat. They’re all about the money, and they are making piles of it because there is a lot of gold in them thar turncoat hills.”

May 8, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Betsy DeVos Brings Back Due Process and Libs Lose It. “Liberals are aghast that DeVos has brought fairness to a previously nightmarish situation. Rather than objectively assess the new rules, they’re miffed that their least favorite Cabinet member dared touch something that The Lightbringer instituted. “

April 30, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Will This Pandemic Throw the Election to the Drooling Idiot Biden?

A month and a half ago I would have said that this drooling moron had no chance of winning this election.

Now, however, some of this nation’s Democratic governors have managed to shut down their states and make people suffer for purely political purposes.

Economic ruin is Joe Biden’s best friend.

I’m still thinking that not even coronavirus could get Biden elected, but I’m also still thinking he might not actually be the nominee.

March 16, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: We’re Still Open for Business! “We here at PJ Media are lucky, we are all still working while so many in the country aren’t. Somebody has to write about all of this insanity, and these are heady times for those of us who have been working remotely for years. What we are calling ‘social distancing’ now used to be referred to as my mood. Once I realized that I had enough toilet paper and vodka I knew that this was the crisis I’ve been prepping for.”

March 13, 2020

KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Screw It America, I’m Beer Blogging. “There is no end game to any of the cancellation madness. If there were, it would all make more sense. Put some metrics in place that would trigger the end of the postponements and cancellations. What we’ve seen in the last two days is all-out panic, which is never useful.”

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