The Morning Briefing: Trump Gets the Green Light to Take a Flamethrower to the System

AP Photo/Joe Maiorana

Top O’ the Briefing

Happy Friday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Tedrick’s new acquaintances never knew what to make of his boast that he was the “Homemade Unguent King of San Bernardino County.”

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I see that pretty much everyone disagreed with my characterization of Alejandro Mayorkas as dumb in yesterday’s Briefing. I’m sticking with it. The guy looks lost every time he’s on camera. And I don’t think there is some grand plan by the people who run Biden’s pudding brains. I think the flailing they’re doing due to their incompetence is destroying the country.

SPEAKING OF DESTROYING THE COUNTRY…

A totally super serious and impartial grand jury took the Democrats’ pathetic daddy issues to a new low and indicted Donald Trump yesterday. Kevin wrote about it for us and asked if this would hand Trump the White House. Anybody who has been reading me for a while knows where I stand on that. I think that Manhattan District Attorney Alvin Bragg just made a huge in-kind contribution to the Trump 2024 campaign.

Our writers were obviously all over this yesterday afternoon.

Robert had Trump’s reaction here, while Victoria covered his attorney’s. Matt wrote about Ron DeSantis’s interesting comments on the indictment. Catherine highlighted the reactions shared on Twitter by prominent Republicans. This was what the speaker of the House of Representatives had to say:

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The election interference angle was brought up by others in the House, which is a good sign. Unified pushback is what’s needed here.

The Democrats are so terrified of running against Trump next year (the “IT DOESN’T MATTER BECAUSE IT’S ALL RIGGED AND WE’RE DOOOOOOMED!” crowd can just skip ahead to the comments and begin the rending of garments now) that they couldn’t wait until next year to begin their election tampering.

Anyone with even a passing familiarity of the Democrats knows they won’t stop with Trump when it comes to preemptive election strikes like this. Oppo research is taking on a whole new meaning for them.

I wrote at the beginning of the year that I would be all-in if Trump promised a scorched-earth second term. Here’s an excerpt from that:

After all of the Beltway backstabbing that Trump endured from both sides of the aisle, I sincerely hope that if he returns, it is with a single-minded focus on righting wrongs, real or imagined. I told a friend of mine the other day that I want him to show up to his second inauguration wearing nothing but a codpiece and carrying a flamethrower. Just to set the tone.

After the antics of Bragg’s pet grand jury, I would hope that Trump is in a flamethrower mood (don’t dwell on the codpiece — I often say things that even I don’t understand) and ready to go after the corrupt system with more verve than ever before.

The rot in American politics today is toxic and a threat to the Constitution. Contrary to the opinions of many, Trump is not the problem.

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But he may very well be the solution.

Please consider subscribing to the Morning Briefing here. It’s free and it helps keep me off the streets.

The Mailbag of Magnificence

TGIF, mis amigos. Let’s begin with this note from Chris:

Stephen,

Regarding your “little crazy but not sick” approach to dealing with the REAL crazies trying to control our country, I’m reminded of the cautious approach/definition of Will Rogers:

Diplomacy is the art of saying ‘Nice doggie’ until you can find a rock.

I’ve also noted that when confronted by a charging, rabid, foaming-at-the-mouth dog, one CAN try to assuage it by patting in on the head, but just twice, once with each hand, after which you’ve run out of hands.

Woof.

Wise words, from both you and Will Rogers. I’m still waiting for the leftists to try and posthumously cancel Rogers for being honest and having a good time doing it.

MB doesn’t like my vocabulary:

Please stop calling these killings “tragedies”.

Floods, earthquakes, wildfires, and the like are tragedies — the result of powerful, unstoppable forces beyond human control.

These mass murders, deliberate acts of wilful evil, are ATROCITIES.

I get a lot of “stop using this word” emails and comments. Look, if there’s a word you prefer, then you can state your preference without telling me mine is wrong, because it isn’t. “Tragedy” is perfectly acceptable in the context I used it. Yes, what happened was an atrocity. It was also a horror and a nightmare. I had to pick one word.

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Here is David’s comment about my assertion that the Biden administration is a never-ending parade of incompetent idiots:

We ought not be surprised — Joe made it clear when he said, “Hunter is the smartest guy I know!” That means everyone else he knew was dumber than Hunter!

You’re right, David, I should have known. I think I’d mentally blocked that out to save what shreds of sanity I have left.

Let’s finish with this from Krysta:

I was going to open with Hi, Stephen, but I like this better …

King Kruiser,

I enjoy every part of the Morning Briefing. My favorite changes from day to day. Today my favorite was The Kruiser Kabana, especially the Kruiser Komedy. I was literally afraid to take a sip of my coffee for fear that it would come spewing out my nose!

You’re doing God’s work with the Briefing. Keep it up!

This is how you guarantee a spot in the Mailbag, ladies and gentlemen.

Thank you, Krysta, for your kind words. I’m especially glad that you like all of the different sections. I think it’s important to give people more than just the news to kick off the day. We’ve got to lighten things up whenever we can.

Thanks to all who wrote in this week!

Everything Isn’t Awful

NOT COOL, KID!

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ALL THE LOLs.

The Kruiser Kabana

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Let’s head into the weekend with some good ol’ 1970s fun. This is one of my favorite covers ever. TURN IT UP.

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