The Morning Briefing: Monday, Fun Day — Let's Barter Some Blue States for Canada and Greenland

Adrian Wyld/The Canadian Press via AP

Top O' the Briefing

Happy Monday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Tackenskrenz was gaining quite a reputation as the nation's premier collector of wearable Tony Danza memorabilia. 

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We're going to kick off the week with a mostly lighthearted look at some of the news from over the weekend. There will be plenty of time between now and Friday to deal with rogue judges, Chuck Schumer's late-life crisis, and whatever monumentally stupid thing that Jasmine Crockett says that day. Heck, we might have to put someone on a full-time Jasmine Crockett watch, now that I think of it.

It's been fun watching President Trump drive Canadian leftists crazy with his talk about making their country the 51st state. He's also set off some of the 14 people in Greenland with talk of adding it to the United States map. The entertainment value of their reaction is worth it whether the president is serious or not. 

While it's true that President Trump has a penchant for amusing, off-the-cuff remarks, it's wise to never dismiss anything that he says. He became successful in real estate by thinking big, after all. Because he isn't a lifelong career politician, Trump has better follow-through than most in Washington. Saying that he wants Greenland to be his next acquisition might seem like trolling to some, but many others are already planning on attending Independence Day festivities there on a 4th of July in the not-too-distant future.

Canada is a different story. If it didn't have the United States on one side and Santa's elves on the other, it would have been invaded and occupied by a country a third of its size long ago. At the rate it's going right now, an ambitious Girl Scout troop could use its cookie money to take over Canada. Canadians who are suffering from Trudeau weariness would no doubt love to soon be flying the Stars and Stripes. 

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The administration is keeping things interesting on the Greenland front. This is from Sarah:

When Donald Trump and JD Vance took office, many of us wondered what role our second lady Usha Vance would play in the administration. So far, it's been a quiet but important one. While she accompanied her husband to Paris in February, she's also been taking on solo assignments. Earlier this month, she traveled to Turin, Italy for the Opening Ceremony of the Special Olympics, and based on pictures I've seen, she's been active in her new role as one of the newly appointed members of the Kennedy Center Board of Trustees.

On Sunday, she announced a second upcoming overseas trip, and this one's pretty major; the second lady is going to Greenland. Mrs. Vance took to Instagram today to make the announcement via video. 

The White House announced that Mrs. Vance will bring her son along, presumably her oldest, Ewan, who accompanied her to Italy, and she'll be joined by a presidential delegation.

I'm no presidential history expert, but I'm pretty sure that Greenland hasn't gotten this much attention from the United States in, well, ever. OK, it got some during the Trump 45 administration. 

I don't presume to know the nuts and bolts of adding an extra country or two to this great land, but I'm a big fan of the barter system. Perhaps we could offload some blue states in exchange. Sure, it will make for whacky national borders and maps, but these are strange times we live in. Perhaps we could swap Colorado for some Canadian provinces that aren't full of commies. The state is certainly asking for it. Robert covered this disturbing story:

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This played out in Colorado recently, as Fox News reported Sunday: “a Republican lawmaker from Colorado expressed shock at being told by Democratic colleagues that he had to remove a sticker supporting the Second Amendment from his laptop while in the state's House chamber.” It’s not surprising that it would be about the Second Amendment. Democrats have hated that one for decades, and have tried in innumerable ways to take an axe to it. In Colorado this time, however, they had to content themselves with silencing someone who dared to express open support for the hated Constitutional provision.

I'm so old I remember when the Democrats would make the effort to hide their contempt for the Constitution of the United States. Now they wear it like a badge of leftist honor.

Some of my fondest stand-up memories are from Colorado, which was once a gloriously free state. Its journey from purple to blue has happened in a heartbeat and has me worried that my beloved Arizona might be on the same trajectory. That such a magnificent place has become so polluted by the Democrats' commitment to the commie path makes it a sad but fitting candidate for barter.

We would, of course, have to evacuate the VodkaPundit family before any exchange was final.

Yeah, I'm kidding here — mostly — but pondering the Democrats' "America Last" philosophy is so disheartening and maddening that sometimes the only response I have is a dose of absurdity. 

Then again, a lot of the absurd stuff I've been flippantly throwing out into the universe these last several years has been coming true. 

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