The Morning Briefing: The Final Ride of Adderall Joe

AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite

Top O' the Briefing

Happy Tuesday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Astwellecker was surprised that Polaroids of his "corduroy chaps and tie-dye" years were a hit with the cul-de-sac smash burger devotees. 

Advertisement

Fight those DNC blues. The Democrats are gearing up to finish their destruction of America, and we at PJ Media and the Townhall Mothership are gearing up to fight with everything we've got to thwart them. During the commie comrade klatch known as the Democratic National Convention, we're bringing back our HUGE MASSIVE MEGA VIP SALE. When you subscribe here and use the promo code FIGHT, you'll receive a whopping 60% discount and greatly aid our efforts to help get the Dem lunatics away from the White House. That's just a few bucks a month for VIP Gold access to all the Townhall Media sites (PJ Media, Townhall, HotAir, RedState, Bearing Arms, and Twitchy). Join the commie-fighting fun, won't you?

The Democratic National Committee's treatment of Joe Biden on the first night of the Democratic National Convention was, put mildly, not very respectful. President LOLeightyonemillion was forced to cool his heels long past his bedtime, which Matt first wrote about here

Nothing says, "We still love this guy and there was no coup," like making the President of the United States loll about in the green room while a parade of party lessers comes close to turning his Monday speech into a Tuesday speech. 

I didn't really pay attention to the clock, but I did watch much of the speech once they got the old boy onto the stage. It was obvious from the get-go that his medical staff had managed to pull off the same trick that they did for the State of the Union address earlier in the year. There was even more evidence that that was the case last night. 

Advertisement

My RedState colleague Sister Toldjah posted some video of Biden during the sound check and walkthrough that happened earlier on Monday. It features the addled, half-asleep puppet president that we've all become so familiar with, especially this year. I wouldn't have put money on him staying awake past the Early Bird Special after seeing that. 

His handlers got the uppers cocktail timed right, however, and it was the wired, angry, SOTU version of Joe Biden who hit the stage as midnight drew nigh. Forget the soft mumbling; Screamin' Joe was back. If you like emphatic finger-pointing, Biden's DNC farewell speech was the motherlode. The puppet masters also seemed to have had him practice shaking his fist a lot. 

Even when he stuck to the script, it was nonsensical. Remember, the Democrats still insist that his presidency has been a shining success. Heck, they're doubling down on it because Kamala Harris is just going to regift his lousy policies to the American people. He spent much of his time touting his alleged accomplishments, but because of whatever trickery they used to keep him awake, he seemed more angry than proud while doing it.

I mean, like, really angry. There's only much magic that can be worked with stimulants; they can't be fine-tuned for occasional subtlety. 

The teleprompter to Biden's right was his favorite, and he frequently turned that way and paused while searching for his place. And, now that I think of it, I can't be certain if I ever saw him blink. On the occasions that his gaze overshot the 'prompter, Biden immediately went into "English as a second language" mode. Also, at RedState, my colleague Nick Arama posted some of the lowlights of the speech. 

Advertisement

Although he's too far gone to know it, everything about Joe Biden Night at the DNC was embarrassing for him. Here's Victoria's spot-on take on the evening: 

And on Monday night, the first night of the Democrat nominating convention, Joe was asked to publicly bend the knee before Kamala Harris and kiss her ring. 

This impotent man—too addled to run for the Democrat nomination, but not too far gone to "run the country"—was ordered to go out there and hope nobody notices how he suffers from electile dysfunction and can't go on. 

In effect, Joe Biden is being treated in the same way he's treated the American people during his time in office: a second-string collection of wallets to give him another nice suit and new home. 

The Democrats' flying monkeys in the mainstream media can tell all of the tall tales that they want, but Joe Biden's occupation of the Oval Office has been an unmitigated disaster. His "GET OFF MY LAWN!" approach to patting himself on the back did a lot more to highlight that fact than to spin it. 

Especially after his own party already told him to get off its lawn. 

Click the button below to get the Morning Briefing emailed to you every weekday. Have your coffee with me, people. It's free and it supports conservative media!  

The Mailbag of Magnificence contributions can be sent to [email protected].

Everything Isn't Awful

I bet Howie Mandel was called a juvenile platypus more than once when he was young. 

Advertisement


SFK of the Day

Hate to Be a Buzzkill, but I Don't Care About Rally Crowd Sizes

"On the flip side, the Democrats don't need public displays of enthusiasm as much. There was none for Biden this year, of course, so I'm sure they are enjoying any evidence of Kamalamania that they see outside of MSM news and production rooms, however artificial it may be. 

The thing that the Dems enjoy more, however, is seeing operatives laying plans to get people out for early voting and getting the ballot harvesting machine ready to hum."

Shot of Vodka

If Harris Is Doing So Great, Why Did She Go Full Commie?

"Kamala Harris was cruising to victory — if the press was to be believed — running a "vibes" campaign with less content than a hobo's day-old can of Sterno. So why did she make a hard left turn just days before her re-anointment as the Democratic presidential nominee?"

PJ Media

VodkaPundit. Kursk Is Ukraine's Middle Finger to Biden

The Chaos Begins: Pro-Hamas Rioters Break Down Perimeter at DNC

BOMBSHELL Biden Impeachment Report Released

VodkaPundit. Your TV Is Spying on You, but I Can Show You How to Make It Stop

Muslim Migrant With Journals Vowing ‘Jihad’ Admits to Stealing New Jersey School Bus

‘Crime Free USA’: Trump Vows to Demolish Deadly Dem Policies

What Did the CCP Get in Return for Helping to Fund Tim Walz's China Travel Business?

At this Point, Candace Owens Should Grow Out the Rest of Her Mustache

Advertisement

As a Canadian Imam Calls for Jihad in Muhammad’s Name, a Tough Question Must Be Asked

Confidence in the UK's New Government Is Dropping

The Church of England No Longer Identifies as a Church

Democrat Civil War Watch: Joe Biden To Skip Obama's and Kamala's Speeches at DNC

Worst. Theater. Ever. Kamala Reboots Biden’s Gas Station Visit, and It Was Bad

What the Experts Aren’t Telling You About the Looming Recession

The Final Insult: Biden Pushed Out of Primetime

Townhall Mothership

Schlichter. Where the Race to Save America Is Right Now

John Fetterman Is Skipping the DNC. Here's Why.

DNC Makes Tim Walz's Stolen Valor Concerns Even Worse

Will Monday Be the Last We See of Joe Biden at the DNC?

SHOCKER! The Guardian Makes Valid Point on Guns

Cam&Co. Columnist Claims GOP in Terror Over Walz's 'Masculinity'

Pennsylvania AG's Argument Against Lawsuit Makes No Sense

Chait: The Goals of Anti-Zionist Protesters Are Not Admirable

Democrats Determined to Stick a Big, Fat, CSM Walz Finger in Veterans' Eyes

Pentagon Alien Hunter: We Are Not Alone or Safe

Patrons Furious After They All Got Tossed Out of Famous Restaurant to Have 'Staged' Event for Harris

Elon Musk Stands Up to Brazil's Thug Supreme Court Ordering X to Censor Lula's Political Enemies

Fairy dust and b.s. Trump's Base Remains Solid, So Who's Driving Kamala Harris' Rise in the Polls?

Protesters at DNC Dress as Abortion Pills

Tim Walz Says ‘Everybody Shares’ in Communist China

Former Walz Supporter Says America's 'Cool Dad' Is an Authoritarian Socialist With a TEMPER

Advertisement

VIP

OK, So Is Kamala a Drunk?

Uninjected? You Need Not Apply to Harris Campaign

Will Kamala's Economic Policy Be Her Undoing?

COVID Wastewater Surveillance: Scam or Legit?

The New DNC Platform Says the Quiet Part Out Loud

Around the Interwebz

Go woke, go bye-bye. ‘The Acolyte’ Canceled: No Season 2 For Disney+’s ‘Star Wars’ Series

Lufthansa is using artificial sharkskin to streamline airplanes

The Long, Strange History of the Word ‘Weird’

Bee Me


The Kruiser Kabana

Kabana Gallery


Kabana Comedy/Tunes

#RIP Phil Donahue

Recommended

Trending on PJ Media Videos

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Advertisement
Advertisement