The Morning Briefing: 'Self-Deport' Gets My Early Vote for Phrase of the Year

Top O' the Briefing

Happy Wednesday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Andustaalia just knew that she was going to be the alt-Moon Pie queen of the Alfonso Ribeiro Devotee Summer Confab.

Didn't tariffs end the world on Monday? I've been so dead from the end of net neutrality all these years that I can't keep up with every apocalypse.

The always-high drama of the Trump-hating left loons was higher than usual as we came out of last weekend. I saw people gleefully speculating that President Trump would be run out of office because iPhones were going to cost a kajillion dollars or something. It was an overwrought version of the "walls are closing in on Trump" fantasy that the Dems have been leg-humping since he was first elected in 2016.

As my good friend Kevin wrote yesterday, Trump is doing just fine this week.

It's the people who oppose what the president is trying to accomplish and/or shouldn't be here who are having a rough go of it. Let's take a look at the latter group this morning. This is from a post Matt wrote yesterday:

President Trump is done playing games with illegal immigrants who refuse to leave after receiving deportation orders. The administration announced a bold new plan to impose hefty $998 daily fines on migrants who overstay their deportation orders. It's not stopping there, either; it will also seize property from those who don't pay up.

My, what a difference having a determined and successful businessman in the Oval Office makes. This is the kind of federal revenue generating I can get behind. People who want to crash a country illegally and live on that country's dime have most of Europe open to them to live out that dream.

Bugger off and eat some shepherd's pie, already.

There was some more meaty news about the Biden open borders policy being over, which Rick wrote about:

Another bit of massive overreach of immigration law was Biden's designation of the "Customs and Border Protection Phone Application" (CBP One) as a way to enter the U.S. legally until the migrant's plea for asylum was heard. More than 900,000 people were allowed to enter the U.S. with virtually no vetting.
Trump has now ended that program as well, ordering those who entered the U.S. using the CBP One app to leave immediately.
Biden's massive misuse of the immigration parole system was usually reserved for small numbers of refugees. The unheard-of number of nearly a million migrants entering the country under a system that allowed migrants to live and work in the U.S. legally for two years has now ended.
“Canceling these paroles is a promise kept to the American people to secure our borders and protect national security,” the Department of Homeland Security media affairs unit said.
The migrants were urged to "self-deport."

The Biden years featured an endless torture of the rule of law in the pursuit of fundamentally transforming the United States into something unrecognizable. That's what President Trump and his administration are up against.

Cleaning up the havoc that Biden's open-borders obsession wrought is a daunting and complex task. President Trump and his administration aren't just dealing with the illegal alien problems of the last four years, however. Long before Sir Sniffsalot got to the White House, the open-borders Democrats were aided and abetted by weak Republicans who were afraid of having something mean said about them in The New York Times or on CNN.

The lunacy of almost all of the Democrats' immigration policies is quickly exposed when one attempts to find other countries that do things in a similar fashion. Spoiler alert: you can't just waltz into another country without so much as a cursory background check and be allowed to work. Next time that an open borders Dem gets in your face, dare them to try it.

I am rather enjoying the bit of panache that Trump, Tom Homan, and others have when dealing with the relocation of the "migrants" who arrived here via the Biden Pandora's Box of nightmare immigration policy. Telling some of them to "self deport" is one of the most baller moves I've ever seen. It's a more diplomatic way of telling them "don't let the door hit you on the way out."

I think that President Trump has made it clear by now that listening to him is a wiser move than running to a judge who has a Lincoln Project tramp stamp and hoping to delay the inevitable. It will be interesting to see how many heed the suggestion.

Contributions to the Mailbag of Magnificence can be sent to [email protected].

Click the button below to get the Morning Briefing emailed to you every weekday. Have your coffee with me, people. It's free and it supports conservative media!

Everything Isn't Awful

Hi! 😊 pic.twitter.com/rHUrv4Lzqu
— Buitengebieden (@buitengebieden) April 7, 2025

Trump Broke Him/Her/They/Them/Zher

Judge Boasberg cancels planned hearing to review Trump deportations https://t.co/CgpqXUfFmT
— Fox News (@FoxNews) April 8, 2025

Reduct This

Same! This Tulip Would Rather Die Than Open Up: https://t.co/lrfD30KrGO pic.twitter.com/wDVCrQoR6J
— Reductress (@Reductress) April 5, 2025

The Kruiser Kabana

Kabana Gallery

Mountain Goats #artbots #marc pic.twitter.com/SXrMM2xbI2
— Franz Marc (@franzmarcart) March 28, 2025

Kabana Comedy/Tunes

POTUS Press Today

In-Town Pool
Wire: Bloomberg
Photos: AFP, NYT, Reuters, Getty
TV Corr & Crew: CNN
Secondary TV Corr & Crew: OAN
Print: CQ Roll Call
Radio: NPR
New Media: Breitbart

EDT
9:00 AM In-Town Pool Call Time

2:00 PM THE PRESIDENT participates in a Photo Opportunity with Racing Champions
South Portico
White House Press Pool

2:30 PM THE PRESIDENT signs Executive Orders
Oval Office
Closed Press

Become part of the PJ Media VIP party by subscribing here. Use promo code KRUISERMB to receive a WHOPPING 60% discount. Trust me, we’re having fun over here.