The Morning Briefing: The Biden Presidency Is a Poorly Written Horror Novel

Top O’ the Briefing

Happy Monday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Shane’s pet capybara looks askance at him whenever he rearranges his action figures.

While watching the Biden spin machine working 24/7 the last few weeks, one thought kept popping up in my head: it’s got to be exhausting covering for this clown.

Let’s begin with a little something I saw on Twitter last night:

LOL. I'm sure that this staged photo-op to make it seem like he's cognitively functional and working didn't take that much out of him. He got back to his Legos in no time. https://t.co/MqZ7XmNMPq

— SFK (@stephenkruiser) August 1, 2022

At first glance, it may seem that NBC News is doing a mini hit piece on President LOLEightyonemillion but that’s not the case at all. This is really just a roundabout way of making it seem like the old boy is robust, sharp, always on the job, and not the feeble, confused guy we see in public. Hit pieces on sitting Democratic presidents don’t get editorial green lights at NBC.

Everything about this presidency is fiction.

For example, there is this recession that really isn’t a recession, according to the cabal that runs Biden’s brain. That’s a fantastical tale that has required a thorough reworking of economic theory by the Biden administration. A reworking that no one whose grocery bills have gone through the roof is buying, by the way.

We’ve all lost count of how many times the White House has had to immediately walk back something that Biden said. A few weeks ago, I wrote that Biden’s handlers shouldn’t let him step in front of a microphone anymore. Unfortunately, they never take my advice, and they let him do things like talk to other world leaders.

Robert wrote a column over the weekend about Biden’s call with China’s Xi Jinping and the subsequent White House retelling of that:

Faux-president Old Joe Biden spoke with China’s President Xi Jinping for over two hours on Thursday, but what they talked about is a matter of some dispute. The White House, understandably given Joe’s marginal grasp on the English language and rational discourse these days, released no transcript, instead giving us a terse one-paragraph “readout” on the call. Then Karine Jean-Pierre told the assembled Leftist media sycophants and Peter Doocy that Tough Old Joe called out Xi for genocide and forced labor in China, and China’s Ministry of Foreign Affairs (MFA) was annoyed: Joe, the Chinese said, did no such thing. Now, who are you gonna trust? The Chinese Communist Party, or Lyin’ Joe Biden?

“According to White House Press Secretary,” the MFA declared, “‘genocide’ & ‘forced labor’ came up in last night’s call between Chinese & US Presidents. That is disinformation.” MFA spokesperson Lijian Zhao said that Jean-Pierre’s claim was “pure lies. White House spokesperson said the issues of genocide and forced labor were mentioned in the call last night, that is false information.”

Given Team Biden’s practically nonexistent relationship with the truth, we’re at the point where we have to ponder whether the ChiCom propaganda machine might have a couple more kernels of truth than that of the White House Press Secretary.

Anybody missing the mean tweets yet?

The people surrounding Biden had to lie about him all throughout the 2020 campaign just to get him to the shenanigans that enabled him to occupy the Oval Office. The Joe Biden they sold to feeble-minded Democrats — moderate, capable, calm — never existed. It’s all been just one awful exercise in creative writing since.

And like every Stephen King novel written in the last 30 years, it’s a story that goes on far too long.

Everything Isn’t Awful

Put that kid to work.

Best ball boy ever.. 🎾😊

🎥 IG: astamm pic.twitter.com/Kxn2aNvqZs

— Buitengebieden (@buitengebieden) July 30, 2022

Smells Like Onion

Urinating is how dogs mark their territory. If your dog has urinated in your home, quickly transfer all titles into their name and leave the property immediately. https://t.co/5IMonZrDYr

— The Onion (@TheOnion) July 29, 2022

The Kruiser Kabana

Kabana Gallery

Green Landscape, 1997 #impressionism #yablonska https://t.co/KXO7NUTx5I pic.twitter.com/22NVJpDmng

— Tetyana Yablonska (@ArtistYablonska) July 24, 2022