The Morning Briefing: Idiot Democrats Think There's Some Kumbaya on the Way

Stephen Kruiser | 5:27 AM on November 25, 2020

Democrats Want to Be Our Friends Now or Something

Happy Wednesday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Beer is better than stuffing.

Every. Single. Time.

Far be it from me to ever try and figure out what’s going on in the mind of any American Democrat here in the 21st century. Sure, there was a simpler time when I understood a little about them. I worked with them all of the time, we hung out, we shared important moments in our lives.

It always seemed as if we were from the same planet back then.

Here in the Inglorious Year of the Chinese Bat Flu Mail-In Ballot Fraud Election, I’m not only unable to reach across the aisle, I’m not really sure where in the heck the freakin’ aisle is anymore.

They are making overtures over there on the Left. We are hearing a lot about healing and unity and coming together and all kinds of other stuff that we’re supposed to expect as we move into the Hallmark Christmas movies time of the year.

I have one burning question: Have these morons met themselves?

The drooling sack of empty that they are calling President-elect Biden has undergone an image makeover that’s most unbelievable. We’re now being told that he’s our kindly best pal and that he is going to put a big band-aid on all of the ORANGE MAN BAD hurt that our beloved country has suffered through.

No, seriously everyone, kindly Grandpa Gropes wants us all to be better now:

The election is over.

It’s time to put aside the partisanship and the rhetoric designed to demonize one another.

We have to come together.

— Joe Biden (@JoeBiden) November 24, 2020

Somebody should tell the 25-year-old intern running Biden’s Twitter account to read up on the Obama era, and learn about the president and his vice-spaz who ran around for eight years projectile vomiting divisive rhetoric that sought to demonize every conservative in America.

Are you starting to get the feeling that I’m probably not interested this big Democrat group hug feint?

If I were a Democrat, however, maybe this oh-so-sincere gesture from A TELEVISION CELEBRITY would warm my heart:

I’d like to extend an olive branch to Trump supporters.

I am ready to move #ForwardTogether.

There’s so much work to do to heal the nation. Let’s be a part of the solution and not add to the problems we face.

My comments are open. Please reply with #ForwardTogether. ❤️

— Alyssa Milano (@Alyssa_Milano) November 24, 2020

Cue “Can You Feel the Love Tonight” from The Lion King.

For those of you who don’t frequent Twitter, Ms. Milano has spent the last four years redefining “unhinged” with her behavior toward President Trump and anyone who dared to support him. All because Trump legitimately won a presidential election that she — and the rest of insane liberal America — thought her lazy candidate was entitled to.

Now that she thinks she’s gotten her way we’re all supposed to be BFFs and head to the salon together for mani-pedis.

Some of this nonsense might be just a little bit believable if it weren’t being spearheaded by a lunatic with anger issues who’s been in the public eye for half a century and has been a spiteful tool toward his political opposites the entire time.

And if every one of us on the Right had amnesia, of course.

You can keep your offers of Kumbaya, lefties. We will be over here remembering what bottom-feeding scum you’ve been since late 2016.

We’ll also be tweaking that #resist thing you’ve been doing.

There will be a lot of that if people from the other side keep pretending to make nice with me.

Have a lovely day.

Dear Democrats: Here’s What You Can Do With Your Unity Candle

Ladies and Gentlemen, We Have a Winner

Biden says we need “fresh thinking” to tackle the problems of today as he stands with career bureaucrats that have been in government for decades.

This is SNL level stuff.

— Lauren Boebert (@laurenboebert) November 24, 2020

KICK IT!

34 years ago these three young men fought for our rights, and we have let them all down. pic.twitter.com/FT50U6fRbO

— Mickey Blowtorch (@MickeyBlowtorch) November 24, 2020

Bee Me

Nation That Revolted Over Three-Pence Tax On Tea Now 'Pretty Cool' With Government Locking Everyone In Their Homes https://t.co/OYQZZhPUbt

— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) November 24, 2020

The Kruiser Kabana

The Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe, Mexico https://t.co/DM1gpE60HW

— Architecture Hub (@architecturehub) November 24, 2020

Just so no one can call me a tease…

Always disappointed that Forensic Files never did any holiday specials.

___

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PJ Media Senior Columnist and Associate Editor Stephen Kruiser is the author of “Don’t Let the Hippies Shower” and “Straight Outta Feelings: Political Zen in the Age of Outrage,” both of which address serious subjects in a humorous way. Monday through Friday he edits PJ Media’s “Morning Briefing.” His columns appear twice a week.

For media inquiries, please contact [email protected].

PJ Media senior columnist and associate editor Stephen Kruiser is a professional stand-up comic, writer, and recovering political activist who edits and writes PJ's Morning Briefing, aka The Greatest Political Newsletter in America. His latest book, Straight Outta Feelings, is a humorous exploration of how the 2016 election made him enjoy politics more than he ever had before. When not being a reclusive writer, Kruiser has had the honor of entertaining U.S. troops all over the world. Follow on: X, MeWe, GETTR.