Guy Tries to Sneak 3.5 lbs. of Something Truly Disgusting Through Dulles International Airport

A bat skeleton is visible in the lower left of this scan of a passenger's luggage. Source: U.S. Customs and Border Protection

In today’s installment of Diversity Makes America Stronger, a gentleman attempted to smuggle several pounds of well-done bat steaks into the country by cramming them into his luggage. The traveler, who was returning from a trip to Ghana, made sure to pack plenty of sides along with his protein; 12 pounds of tetrapleura (a fruit primarily used as a spice), eggplants, and turkey berries (pea-sized yellow and green berries) were packed as well.

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On April 5, U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) agents noticed an incriminating bat skeleton in a routine scan of the man’s luggage and pulled it aside for a closer look. Once the balanced meal was discovered, all the ingredients were seized. CBP agriculture specialists destroyed the prohibited fruits, while the bat meat was handed over to the CDC for analysis. The CBP noted:

Bat is considered bushmeat and is a routine protein staple in Africa. However, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), bushmeat is illegal to import to the United States and bats are known vector species for zoonotic diseases, such as Ebola.

In case you’ve ever wanted to know what grilled bat looks like, the CBP folks thoughtfully provided a photo in their reportage:

Looks okay but a little dry — maybe it just needs a drizzle of béarnaise or a nice reduction of some sort.

For what it’s worth, I am generally the first person to try a local delicacy when I travel. I 1,000% respect the rights of diverse people to eat, wear, say, make, and do diverse things. I’m all for local customs; I just prefer them to remain local. Especially these days, when we’re all expected to dress like surgeons as we go about our daily business and wash our hands at OCD levels.

Related: Bombshell Project Veritas Exposé Poses Urgent Questions for Fauci and the Entire Pandemic Response

The CBP statement has a timely recommendation: “With international travel picking up post-COVID and the coming busy summer travel season, CBP urges all travelers to visit CBP’s Travel website to ‘know before they go’ and learn what they can and cannot bring to the United States and to pick up tips to quickly clear CBP’s arrivals inspection process.”

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“During a typical day last year, CBP agriculture specialists across the nation seized 4,552 prohibited plant, meat, animal byproducts, and soil, and intercepted 319 insect pests at U.S. ports of entry,” adds the agency.

I’m a bit surprised to learn that people are allowed to carry all these items onto planes at their airports of departure. In case we needed another reason to admire, respect, and support our border agents, we just got one.

The Maryland man was relieved of his illegal feast and sent on his way. Next time he wants to bring a batch of bat barbecue to the States, I recommend he fly to north Mexico and simply walk it across the border.

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