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Insanity Wrap #61: Save Us from Another Terrible Debate, Joe Rogan

AP Photo/Gregory Payan

Insanity Wrap needs to know: What’s better than Chris Wallace moderating a presidential debate?

Answer: Literally anything up to and including stubbed toes, speed traps, and hemorrhagic fevers.

Before we get to the sordid details, a quick preview of today’s Wrap.

  • Andrew Cuomo wants to stick you with his tab
  • Presidential debate inspires dreams of moving to Canada
  • The Brave Sir Biden Supercut

And so much more.

Shall we begin?

This Is Not a Sane World, Exhibit #1,000,006

New York shut down harder than most states, while at the same time New York City gently encouraged a new crime wave that has caused people and businesses to flee.

Both are the work of Democrats, Governor Andrew Cuomo and Mayor Bill de Blasio.

And the rest of us are supposed to bail them out?

Insanity Wrap says: “Drop dead!

Oh, Canada!

Google searches for ‘move to Canada’ spike after presidential debate

Google searches for ‘move to Canada’ spike after presidential debate

It’s never Republicans or conservatives threatening to leave the country if they don’t get their way, Insanity Wrap would remind you, gentle reader.

So we feel safe in wagering that it wasn’t a bunch of Republicans and conservatives watching last night’s debate, then Googling how to move to Canada because they thought their guy was losing.

So get out, hosers.

Your Daily Dose of Mostly Peaceful Protest

They had those mostly peaceful explosives for the mostly peaceful purpose of gathering in a mostly peaceful manner to petition the government for a redress of grievances by mostly peacefully blowing stuff up or at least setting it mostly peacefully on fire.

Insanity Wrap hopes that clears things up for you.

Brave Sir Robin Bravely Turned and Fled

They aren’t saying this because they think Biden wiped the floor with Trump.

They’re saying this because they have every reason to believe that Biden peaked last night, and that it’s going to be all downhill from here.

But Insanity Wrap didn’t have to tell you that, did we?

Previously On Insanity Wrap: ‘USA Today’ Takes on ‘The Babylon Bee,’ Brian Stelter Takes a Leak

Snowflake Nation

University hosting presidential debate offers counseling to discuss ‘impact of recent national events’

We’re sorry we bruised your feelz:

In preparation for the debate, CWRU has arranged for “presidential debate support spaces” where “students can discuss the impact of recent national events, including the presidential debate and upcoming election.” The sessions will be hosted by the University Health and Counseling Services staff, however, the “support Space is not a substitute for psychotherapy and does not constitute mental health treatment.”

The first support space session occurred Monday, a full 36 hours before the debate was set to begin. Students can still sign up for any of the remaining seven virtual sessions from Tuesday night until October 9. The sessions are available for all students from undergrad to professional students and the university only asks that everybody use “respectful dialogue.”

In total, there are eight “presidential debate support spaces” available for students to attend.

Dry your eyes and have a bourbon, Snowflakes.

Where’s the Media?

This story has everything.

Russian payouts, obvious corruption, a political scion using his father’s influence to get rich, drugs and sex-trafficking, a flat-out denial during a televised presidential debate…

A decent press corps would be all over the story, hounding both Bidens for answers.

Instead, we get crickets.

The Craziest Person in the World (Today)

Joe Rogan moderate presidential debate
 (AP Photo/Gregory Payan)

 

Calls For Joe Rogan to Moderate Next Debate Intensify After Chris Wallace’s Disastrous Performance

In this case, when we say “crazy,” we mean it in the best possible way:

Wallace was unable to control either candidate in Cleveland as Biden and Trump constantly interrupted each other throughout the night.

The Fox News host also displayed flagrant bias by abandoning his supposedly neutral role and becoming a third participant in the debate, interrupting Trump 5 times more than Biden.

Earlier this month, Rogan extended an invitation to both Trump and Biden for a 4 hour unedited debate. Trump almost immediately accepted, but the Biden campaign refused to even consider the offer.

Now we know why. Biden can only survive in a debate when the biased moderator is firmly on his side.

Twitter was flooded with calls for Rogan to step in and moderate the next debate.

Well, Joe — are you crazy enough to do it?

Please say Yes.

One More Thing…

Insanity Wrap Calls in Sick
(Seen on Facebook.)

After last night’s drunkblog, Insanity Wrap very nearly pulled this very same stunt this morning.

But at least we got some good laughs out of it — the meme and the drunkblog.

That’s a Wrap for today.

Come back tomorrow for another Insanity Wrap…

…assuming we make it that long.

Previously On Insanity Wrap: Dianne Feinstein Goes Full Mask Hypocrite, Plus Feminist Song Remakes