Klimate-Change Kooks Still At It

Stormy Daniels may come and she may go, but the navel-gazing Henny-Pennys of the Left want you to know that “climate change” is still like totally a thing:

A record-cold “Arctic Blast” is set to hit the East Coast this weekend. And undoubtedly, some people will point to it and say that it proves global warming isn’t for real. That’s totally false: categorically, definitely, unequivocally, scientifically false. And yet it’s made over and over and over again by climate denialists and their paid-for politicians in Washington.

Insert obligatory Trump-bashing here. Then:

Here, then, is the definitive list of four reasons that cold winters do not disprove global warming.

Are you ready for No. 1?

1. Climate Is Personality, Weather Is a Mood

The most important thing to remember, when it comes to climate change, is that it is never possible to trace any single weather event—hurricane, cold snap, dry spell—to climate change. As University of Georgia geography professor John Knox puts it, climate is personality; weather is mood.

In other words, the relevant data for climate change are long-term trends, not short term phenomena (generally, climatologists look at thirty year averages). And there’s no doubt about those trends. According to NASA, the 10 warmest years on record have occurred since 1997. Based on carbon samples, the NOAA says that the last three decades have, on average, been the warmest on 1,000 years.

Remember, this is from the “party of science.” Next, we back away from the old hotness, “global warming,” and wrap our arms around the new hotness, “climate disruption.” What happened to “climate change,” you ask? Well, “disruption” is so much less neutral, and so much more… accusatory:

The Earth’s climatic system is extremely complicated. And so while the core feedback loop of climate change is simple—more carbon dioxide in the atmosphere traps more heat, like glass traps heat in a greenhouse—its effects are anything but. Some parts of the world get hotter, others get colder. And some are thrown into chaos.

That’s why my favorite term to describe what’s going on is “Global Climate Disruption.” The overall trend is predictable, but the individual impacts are not—we’re playing with a complex system on a level never before seen in Earth’s history. Most of the consequences will be unforeseen.

But one thing that we can foresee is… Mother Gaia is in peril! So get out of your cars and onto your bikes now. What’s that you say? It’s snowing in New England in early April?

3. Yes, in Fact, Climate Change Sometimes Makes Winter Worse

Because, reasons, most of which have to do with the North Pole and the Great Lakes. Nevertheless, remember that —

4. The Northeastern United States Is Not the World

So, when you see climate deniers hype up the uncertainty of the science, look closer: It’s never about the basic process of global climate disruption. It’s just about the specific effects. But there is no excuse for confusing weather and climate. When someone says, “It’s cold out, so much for global warming,” the only thing they’re revealing is their own ignorance. As Prince said, sometimes it snows in April.

“Journalism.” Definitive. And now, with more Prince, so you can dance to it.