Time Magazine has announced their nominees for “Person of the Year,” and it is rather depressing how many politicians make the list. These nominations are not recognizing major accomplishments; rather, it indicates just how deeply politics has invaded our daily lives—for example, Mich. Gov. Gretchen Whitmer’s nomination. She is a tin-pot tyrant who is openly defying the limits placed on her authority by the courts. Yes, the same Gretchen Whitmer who made it impossible to buy a car seat early in the pandemic, with some of the most ridiculous COVID-19 restrictions in the country.
A whole host of other mediocre Democrats are in the running. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi also gets props, even though under her leadership, her party just lost over a dozen seats. As an honorable mention, with a big assist from Pelosi’s accomplishment thanks to her insane radical-left rhetoric, Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez got a nomination. Even Georgia’s imaginary governor, Stacey Abrams, is listed. There is not even a tongue-in-cheek accomplishment there.
Left-wing Trojan horse and presumed president-elect Joe Biden makes the grade—perhaps for his most exceptional ability to avoid scrutiny of any kind. Failed Democrat primary contestants Sens. Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren are on the list. Both have been excluded from Beijing Biden’s incoming administration, and Sanders famously traded his movement for a lake house. Well done, everyone.
Apparently, no list is complete without a tyrant or a terrorist. This year it is Recep Tayyip Erdogan for his violent crackdown on the Kurds. Past awards have been given to Yasser Arafat (1993), Vladimir Putin (2007), Adolf Hitler (1938), and Joseph Stalin (1939). New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern, who locked down her entire country due to COVID-19 for about seven confirmed cases, is up for consideration too. Perhaps this is the category Whitmer and her fellow burgeoning authoritarian Governor Andrew Cuomo are nominated in. Stunning achievements in crushing the working class and denying religious liberty.
As of this writing, the scary part is that nearly 20% of those voting think Whitmer should win. A stunning 35% are on board with Cuomo, whose effective population control administered via a horrific nursing home policy must now be seen as an accomplishment. That, or the corporate media is just that skilled at hiding gobsmacking Democrat malfeasance.
There are some other exciting nominees. Netflix CEO Ted Sarandos, whose biggest accomplishment in 2020 was the release of Cuties, followed by a mass exodus of subscribers. Swedish teen scold Greta Thunberg is back, even though she won last year for being exceptionally annoying and blaming her bourgeoise anger on the weather. It looks like Prince Harry is up for being the completely whipped husband of Meghan Markle, who is also nominated. The subtext has to be the most crushing blow to the British monarchy since Wallis Simpson.
Alphabet CEO Sundar Pichai is on the list, ostensibly for swinging the election for Joe Biden through Google’s use of ephemeral experiences. Black Lives Matter activists as a group made the cut, ostensibly for their “fiery but peaceful protests.” Of course, no gratuitous list in 2020 would be complete without Dr. Anthony Fauci, for his achievement to get the completely useless drug remdesivir an Emergency Use Authorization from the FDA.
I thought I missed a Triple Crown winner when I saw the name Megan Thee Stallion. Then I saw she is an artist. Kanye West, Billie Eilish, and someone who goes by the name Bad Bunny are also on the list. At least West has some legit credibility given his previous work on criminal justice reform with his wife, Kim Kardashian. Best I can tell the other three sing. That’s it.
Trevor Noah has 22% agreeing he should be in the running. And he may be the lowest-rated late-night host except for Samantha Bee. There are also various other authors, sports figures, and large groups like “Essential Workers.” The list of nominees has a distinctly partisan feel.
Perhaps the only nominee who accomplished something historic this year is President Donald Trump. In the last few months, he has been nominated for three Nobel Peace Prizes for significant progress toward a more peaceful and prosperous Middle East, with several Arab nations recognizing Isreal and normalizing economic relations. The agreements with the United Arab Emirates, Sudan, and Bahrain are the first significant moves in decades.
Following the 2020 election and all of the oddities we are still working through, it would be quite a feat if President Trump’s approximately 74 million voters went to Time’s website and gave him the thumbs up. So pass it along. Let’s prove that K-pop fans aren’t the only ones who can execute an epic troll.