Columns

Kruiser's 'The Worst of Times' for the Week of Aug. 29-Sept. 4

New York Times office. Image by tacskooo from Pixabay

(NOTE: I read The New York Times Opinion section so that others don’t have to. While I could write something every day that mocks the lunacy there, I decided to just highlight a few of them once a week. I’ll also offer one from The Washington Post so they don’t feel left out. I provide the actual headline from the op-ed and go from there. Enjoy.)

Welcome, everyone, to Week Two of this recap of the eternal descent into ever-deepening madness in the Opinion section of The New York Times. I hadn’t planned on being on the wagon for the first two installments of this column, but it worked out that way. I’ve learned a lot about myself as I’ve wandered through the Times each day.

Almost all of it is pretty dark.

Into the madhouse!

1. “We Need to Start Traveling Again. Here’s How.”

This one seems innocent enough just from the headline, doesn’t it? It even appears to be an exhortation to return to normalcy and fun.

Then you remember that The New York Times is where normalcy and fun go to die bloody, screaming, hideous deaths.

This article is yet another leftist call to a globalist New World Order:

The solution lies in the global certification of effective vaccines for travel. We know vaccines can significantly reduce the likelihood of infection and transmission, and it is a testament to global science that we have developed vaccines and administered some 5.2 billion doses so quickly. But without recognition of these vaccines across borders and the ability of people to prove their vaccinated status (emphasis mine), this progress will not result in easier travel.

The author goes on to talk about a “global, data-driven” system to keep track of the vaccines and those who are vaccinated.

Welcome to Cyber New East Berlin.

The leftist push for a global Kumbaya is irritating. There are far too many countries here on Earth that are absolute garbage. We became arrogant, loud Americans for a good reason: we’re better.

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We don’t need to spend time and effort sharing with Third-World hellholes or the Eurotrash.

And I have no interest in showing my papers to the COVID Stasi.

2. “Do Republicans Actually Want the Pandemic to End?”

This is from the reality-challenged brain of Jamelle Bouie, whom we will no doubt see a lot of in this column as time goes on.

Apparently, Jamelle doesn’t read The New York Times. If he did, he would know that it’s the Democrats and their flying monkeys in the mainstream media who have gone all in on keeping the COVID panic porn alive. I am at the point now where I’m convinced that they all celebrate any news about the Delta variant (and its Greek alphabet-named successors) because they desperately need the public to buy into their “War of the Worlds” fiction if they have any hope of winning an election after Grandpa Sniffsakid besmirches all that he can besmirch while they’re still letting him have unsupervised playtime in the Oval Office.

Bouie attempts to perpetuate the lie that the only people in America who are reluctant to get the vaccine are doing it for purely political reasons. A progressive whining about the politicization of anything is projection to the nth degree.

A good chunk of the op-ed is devoted to Bouie working out his pro-fascist issues with Republican governors who won’t just shut up and worship at the Church of Fauci. Ron DeSantis is obviously the monster under little Jamelle’s bed and it’s a lot of fun to watch.

3. “How Has Joe Biden Become So Unpopular?”

It’s a twofer from Jamelle Bouie this week! I told you we’d be seeing him again.

That’s an actual headline that a professional editor signed off on just a little more than a week after Joe Biden’s nightmarish withdrawal from Afghanistan cost 13 Americans their lives. The answer to the question seems fairly obvious.

Unless, of course, you’re sniffing The New York Times’ Opinion writer glue.

Bouie leads with blaming the Delta variant, Texas, and Florida. Then he mentions Afghanistan. The slavish devotion to the COVID panic porn fetish must go on.

I hope his workspace is toddler-proofed.

4. “The Minimum Voting Age Should Be Zero”

This op-ed, dear readers, is probably the most utterly bat**** crazy thing I have ever read in the Times Opinion section. That’s saying a lot. Prior to reading it, I would have had a difficult time singling one out as the worst of them.

I don’t want you to think I’m exaggerating, so I’ll provide a quote from the article:

But of these three groups, there is only one where the justification for denying the vote is based in irrational animus: the denial of the franchise to children.

This is an injustice that should be corrected. All citizens should be allowed to vote, regardless of their age. The minimum voting age should be zero, with parents and guardians casting the vote for their small children. As those children grow older, parents can include the vote in the gradual increase in independence and responsibility given to young people, until finally their children vote for themselves, likely in their early teen years.

Don’t go back and re-read it 15 times to make sure you got it right, I’ve already done that for you.

When you think about the number of stupid people who breed far too frequently, this goes from being a wacky idea to a horror movie. Even worse, liberals are still procreating in some parts of America. I know, the thought of having sex with a lib makes my stomach do somersaults too, but I think they’re able to get through it by leaving their COVID masks on.

There are layers of stupidity here, beginning with the initial premise. Just when you think that nothing could be dumber than giving one person multiple votes based on the number of progeny he or she has, the author then suggests that kids should start voting “in their early teen years.” You thought vote-by-mail created problems, wait until elections are being swayed by a bunch of hormone-crazed teens who vote based on which candidate has the best TikTok moves.

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And how about divorce-custody-revenge voting? Imagine a host of bitter women (they exist in the wild, I’ve seen them) getting custody of their kids and casting all of the new family votes for the opposite of whatever Dad likes out of spite.

I’m getting a headache just thinking of all the ways this could go wrong.

Now go to bed Timmy, or Mommy and Daddy aren’t going to let you vote until 8th grade!

The only upside I can see to this is that maybe we can put an end to abortion by calling it voter suppression.

PostScript: “Do the unvaccinated deserve scarce ICU beds?”

It really is impossible to make these things up.

This is an easy game to play.

Do longtime smokers deserve treatment for lung cancer?

Do obese people deserve CPR during a heart attack?

You get the idea. Hospitals are filled with people whose roads there were paved with personal choices.

If I eat it on my bicycle I know that the ER staff isn’t going to ask me how fast I was going in order to determine whether I get treated or not.

If leftists really were concerned about public health, they wouldn’t let thoughts and questions like this see the light of day. As I have been writing for a long time though, they don’t care at all whether you live or die. It’s about political control for them, not compassion. They’re ghouls who are all not-too-secretly wishing death upon everyone who doesn’t agree with them politically.

Maybe we should discuss whether they deserve any ICU beds.

Kidding. Even I’m not that mean.

Maybe.

Thanks for hanging out. See you next week!