Karine Jean-Pierre’s Transcriptionist: The Hardest-Working Man in Washington

Or a non-binary.

Let’s be honest; it’s a safe assumption that any given federal employee at this stage is somewhere on the gender-fluid spectrum. It’s a hair away from a job requirement at this point (Karine herself being a much-touted lesbian, in addition to an immigrant and a Person of Color™, the Holy Trinity of Social Justice™ intersectionality).

Via The White House (emphasis added):

Well, here — here’s the thing — well, it is a bipartisan agreement that is the fairest, the toughest agreement that we are going to see or has — we have seen in decades.  The text is out there.  The text is out there.  The Border Patrol union supports it.  The U.S. Chamber of Commerce supports it.  Republicans — governor — a Republican governor and a — and — and Democratic governors have put a letter to- — together — an op-ed supporting this bill.  It could not be stronger or more fairer…

 We’ve heard from Sen- — Senator Tillis, “You don’t normally make this country less safer for political points.”  This is coming from one of their colleagues…

We — I don’t think he could have been any more clear.

Here’s KJP battling complete sentences and fluid stream of thought, in the manner of her nominal boss, straining the transcriptionist’s use of em dashes beyond their intended utility and putting the him/her/zher in a real pickle:

So, look, a couple of things about that — the op-ed that — that we saw.  It is — it is unacceptable to actually put fo- — put to- — put together a bunch of people, honestly, and — and write an op-ed that is actually dangerous... 

The President has been — and his team — has been working around the clock to get this done.  We want to make sure we get those hostages home, including the American hostages.  We understand there are about six of them that are part of that — that are part of the — the folks who are still part of the Amer- — hostages — I should be more clear — that are being held.  We want to get them home.

And here she is, as she does often, blatantly disregarding the longstanding grammatical tradition of articles:

We’ve had — White House officials, including the President, have been in contact with members of Congress.  We don’t read out, obviously, every conversation that the President has.  He has long relat- — long-time relationship — decades of relationship with some of those members on the Hill…

This is something that majority of Americans want to see: get — making sure that we get on top of dealing what is happening at the border, making sure that we fix a broken immigration system.  Doesn’t mean that we stop talking about it.  Doesn’t mean we stop pushing.

          Related: 'You Should Be Ashamed’: Karine Jean-Pierre Excoriated in Today’s Press Briefing

In addition to the grammatical faux pas, the lady regularly (“regularly” being a word she has proven incapable of pronouncing, by the way) uses terms loaded for her into her script that she clearly doesn’t know the meaning of and smushes them together like a toddler smearing spaghetti all over the wall in the hopes that big words will obfuscate her obvious lack of understanding.

Here she is, unironically and apparently unaware of the contradiction, discussing what she calls the “holistic components of the budget,” “holistic” and “component” having polar-opposite meanings:

So, look, what we have been seeing, as you know, from the data — the data has been very clear here — that wages are going up, consumers are spending a lot more, and — this is important — wages are meeting inflation.  That’s important.  And — and obviously, inflation is — it has gone down.  And I think that’s important as well.  You got to look at the holistic components of the data.  And I think that tells you a story of where we are as an economy.