REPUBLICANS POUNCE: Our Awful News Media Is Worse Than You Can Imagine

AP Photo/Gene J. Puskar

Now that the shock of Saturday's attempted assassination of Donald Trump has worn off, the media wasted no time shifting the narrative to "Republicans Pounce!" and, lucky you, I've collected a few of the most outrageous examples.

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"Republicans Place Shooting in Trump’s Narrative of Persecution," the New York Times' Charles Homans wrote, not even 24 hours after a would-be assassin's bullet grazed Trump's ear — an inch away from possibly changing the course of history. "They pointed to portrayals of Mr. Trump as an authoritarian and anti-democratic force in politics, which they argued created a climate that made an attempt on his life inevitable."

How many times do you have to call somebody "literally Hitler" before somebody takes action, anyway?

Over at the Washington Post, Elizabeth Dwoskin and Faiz Siddiqui waited almost exactly 24 hours before going with "Musk, other pro-Trump billionaires have helped shape shooting narrative."

The Post, in case you'd somehow forgotten, is owned by Jezz Bezos, who cried real crocodile tears while his paper was publishing Dwoskin's and Siddiqui's garbage.

"Your newspaper pushes assassination porn EVERY DAY," Mollie Hemingway replied.

On the very same day of the attempted assassination, Newsweek ran this headline: "MAGA responds with outrage after Donald Trump injured at Pennsylvania rally." They've since changed the headline to "Outrage and Blame After Donald Trump Injured at Pennsylvania Rally," which I suppose is marginally better.

I miss the old days when everybody was supposed to be outraged by political violence.

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Maybe the worst example is this one from CBS News, courtesy of the execrable Margaret Brennan.

Maybe someone needs to remind Brennan that the only reason Scalise can pounce is that rehab professionals were able to help him learn how to walk again after a Bernie Bro assassin destroyed his femur, hip, and pelvis.

One more? One more:

Once again: You only think you hate the media as much as you ought to. We all need to try harder!

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And yet, if Republicans and conservatives were any pouncier, we'd have to start dressing up like Democrats.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who still remembers Rep. David Wu (D-Ore.) in this classic Tigger moment from 2011.

Before I let you go, let me give you a genuine example of pouncing in convenient mini photo essay form.

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Remember the summer of 2020?

That's when Democrats took the drug-induced death of George Floyd and "pounced" it into the Summer of Mostly Peaceful Love to whip Democrat voters into a frenzy of racial hatred. That was the same year that Big Government pounced into action during the COVID pandemic to conduct the biggest experiment ever in authoritarian rule over Americans. It's the same year that Democrats pounced all over our election laws, making Election Day a joke and true accountability almost impossible.

And books will be written about all the ways Democrats pounced on Jan. 6 — the few parts they didn't themselves foster, that is.

That's what pouncing looks like, folks — and it ain't pretty.

"In our incredibly heated political environment where everyone to the right of 2024’s Mitt Romney is Hitler," CDR Salamander wrote today, "is a kind of Bill of Attainder designed either to get someone killed or to bankrupt them - probably both."

Conservatives aren't pouncing. We're fighting for our lives.

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