Better Late Than Never -- My Ass

Man, I loved my late 20s and early 30s. Loved them.

I’d finally gotten good at being a bachelor. I had the nicely-decked-out-yet-still-masculine Bachelor Pad. I’d finally learned how to cook and clean and dress like a grown up. I had the cool car, and had even finally gotten over my natural shyness.

I was pretty much the “After” picture in an especially effective episode of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy — the ultimate Toxic Bachelor.

Now, I’m happier. Now, I’m married and want children. Now they finally come up with this?