Just when I thought that I might not have any new things to hate about the Wuhan Chinese Lab Bat Flu, this story hits my Twitter/X feed.
I didn't do a deep dive into the research on this one for a couple of reasons. The first, obviously, is that I'm not a journalist. I'm an opinion writer, which is rather freeing when I just want to get snarky about a news story.
The second is that assuming the worst about any COVID-related news is one of the safest bets of the last several years. When presented with any scenario regarding the pandemic that's irritating, it's almost certainly true. The Occam's Razor variation for COVID-19 is, "The worst explanation is usually the correct one."
According to a STUDY — we know how important those are — ladies who suffered from a bout of the 'Rona may have taken a hit in the friskiness department.
According to a new study, women who have been infected with the virus are more likely to struggle in the bedroom compared to those who swerved the bug.
Scientists suggest this trend is linked to viral diseases disrupting blood flow to genitals, which then leads to lower arousal levels and sexual satisfaction.
Clinical descriptions of sexual arousal really go light on the romance, don't they?
Anyway, SCIENTISTS are suggesting, which is akin to Moses delivering the tablets from Mt. Sinai when COVID is the topic of conversation, as we all learned in 2020.
According to the Brit tabloid I got this information from, the study was "shared in the Journal of Sexual Medicine." Wouldn't you know it? My subscription to JSM expired last November. I'll see if I can renew at the introductory rate. Honestly, the annual "Celebrity Fungal Affliction Trends" issue is worth whatever they want to charge me.
My curiosity is piqued by the suggesting scientists and their study. What I would really like to see are the numbers on the libidinous tendencies of the triple-vaxxed, quintuple-boosted women who still got COVID four times. I'd wager that they're the real Debbie Downers in the bedroom. It's just a hunch, but I think it's a solid one.
"I got all my shots and still got the stupid plague. Fauci lied, I hate all men, and I WILL NEVER BE IN THE MOOD AGAIN."
The study shows that women who suffered from long COVID are the most likely to want to cap off a date with just some cocoa and a quick game of Yahtzee! rather than a coital sojourn. The longer the COVID, the lower the sex drive.
Remember kids: love means never having to say you tested positive.
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