The Left Never Runs Out of Reasons to Complain

Democratic National Convention via AP

Even as the celebrations began on Election Night and carried through to the hangovers of January 21, everyone knew that Progressives would not go gently into the night. Yes, MSNBC, CNN, and John Fetterman made some perfunctory overtures, and at least one bro in the tech fraternity is trying to juggle a few olive branches. But we all understood that there would be wailing and gnashing of teeth. True to form, social media has yielded up a hellish buffet of pierced and panicked leftists, making threats and occasionally indulging good old-fashioned tantrums that would rival those of the heartiest toddlers on supermarket floors and in toy aisles. And yet, Progressives are still able to amaze us with the depth, or lack thereof, of their gripes.

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Now, AOC and at least one of her acolytes are up in arms about Trump's visits to North Carolina and California. The issue? Trump went to North Carolina first. As American Wire pointed out, visiting North Carolina prior to a junket to the Golden State immediately thereafter makes sense due to geography, fuel consumption, and even the carbon footprint of Air Force One and the rest of the president's retinue. Given the fact that the United States is covered in these things called "time zones," the schedule allowed the president to spend as much time as possible on the ground and meet with victims. To a person with average intelligence, it was a sound plan. Surely, the Left could get together with us on the carbon footprint issue, right? Sadly, no.

You see, we are talking about the progressive mind, and when Trump is the subject matter, there is no telling how far afield Leftists will range from logic in the pursuit of something about which to gripe. To that end, we turn to our chief correspondent for unhinged, incomprehensible rants, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who is joined by an unnamed guest star:

Is it just me, or is there something more than slightly disturbing about Bachelorette Number Two? Why is it always the eyes?

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Of course, AOC being AOC, she still has quite the whine list from which to choose when selecting moan du jour. Here she is complaining about Trump's threatened tariffs on Colombia, which, by the way, had the desired effect:

Human trafficking? Murders by gang members? Deadly, illicit drugs? Terrorists crossing the border? Overburdened cities and welfare systems? Who cares? Small potatoes. No, according to AOC, the Trump administration must be opposed because… coffee. Think of the baristas! Won't someone think of the baristas? How ever will the nation continue? 

Related: Lights, Camera, and Crocodile Tears!

So much for the celebrity panel portion of our program; let's move on to the man on the street. This unnamed Ohio man's Gripe of the Day is that — wait for it — his favorite taco joint has closed. (And yes, being a Progressive, he can't form a simple sentence without injecting the "f word.")

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I could not have scripted that any better. A white man is angry about illegal immigration because a Mexican restaurant is closed. Stereotype much, sir? He was probably mad enough to go home and punch a hole in his drywall until he remembered that he couldn't pay anyone under the table to fix it. And it's still winter! Wait until the warm weather hits, and these people are all on the phone with tech support because they have to run their own lawnmowers and weed eaters. 

Pace yourselves, Lefties; you've got almost four years to go.

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