There is nothing wrong with your computer’s monitor. Do not attempt to adjust the picture. We are controlling transmission. If we wish to make it louder, we will bring up the volume. If we wish to make it softer, we will tune it to a whisper. We will control the horizontal. We will control the vertical. We can roll the image, make it flutter. We can change the focus to a soft blur, or sharpen it to crystal clarity. For the next seven minutes, sit quietly and we will control all that you see and hear. You are about to participate in a great adventure. You are about to experience the awe and mystery which reaches from the inner mind to… the Outer Limits of the 2008 presidential race:
SOURCES: Gore has cancelled series of interviews to promote LIVE EARTH. He did TODAY and a radio interview, then cancelled several interviews with local TV stations around the country, citing ‘schedule conflict’…
The Arctic Monkeys, whose name alone sounds like something out of the Outer Limits, could not be reached for comment.
Update: Submitted for your approval–oh wait, sorry, wrong show: “I