I SWEAR I'M NOT MAKING

I SWEAR I’M NOT MAKING THIS UP! Found via Best of the Web, this is a riot:

Mikhail Gorbachev is teaming up with former US president Bill Clinton and actress Sophia Loren to record a new version of the classic children’s musical “Peter and the Wolf.”

Retitled “The Wolf and Peter”, the remake of Sergei Prokoviev’s tale will tell the story from the point of view of the wolf, faced with the encroachments of urbanisation on his dwindling forest habitat.

Why was Gorbachev hired?

Nagano and RNO general director Sergei Markov said they had chosen Gorbachev because, like Clinton, he “has a great ability to communicate.”

The remark drew wry comment in the Russian media, which recalled Gorbachev was often derided in office for his southern accent and long, indecipherable sentences stuffed with Communist party jargon.

Asked whether Gorbachev was rehearsing, Polyakov said “Mikhail Sergeyevich does everything impromptu.”

Scrappleface, call your office!