Dr. Helen

Who Knew? More Sex Makes Married People Happy

From the Federalist:

A study released last year, of 30,000 couples gathered over 40 years, published in the Social Psychological and Personality Science journal, found sex about “once a week” was the magic number for a happy sex life, and increasing that number didn’t necessarily increase happiness, although lowering the number did (duh!).

Of course, not having sex can cause a range of issues for a couple, from low self-esteem, anger, and depression to resentment, stress, and the temptation to cheat. There are myriad reasons why couples don’t do it much. Could one of those be because the quality is less than stellar?

Brendan Zietsch, a psychologist from the University of Queensland, wanted to try to figure out how long couples had sex. When he examined the latest research he found, umm, penetration to you know what can last from 33 seconds to 44 minutes, but the median time was a whopping 5.4 minutes….

If the sexual experience between a couple is only lasting five minutes because she lies there like a sack of potatoes, women, embrace your inner vixen and do what is necessary beforehand to be ready to engage in fun, inhibition-free sex. Whether this is communicating throughout the day, wearing something sexy, or putting the kids to bed early, aren’t these small measures worth a more pleasurable—hopefully longer!—experience?

If we spend more time on social media or watching the game than pursuing a happy, healthy sexual relationship, it’s no wonder it only lasts five minutes once a week. But this doesn’t mean it has to stay this way, and at least you know working toward something better will, at the very least, be fun.