'Prepping' for COVID-19 in LA Includes Everclear, Weed, and Guns, So This Should Work Out Well

You’ve got to hand to it residents of Los Angeles. They know what’s most important in times of emergency.

KTLA reports that weed stores are doing a smoking business as people re-supply so they can float through the COVID-19 trauma. “Business was booming at the Herbarium, a marijuana dispensary in the 900 block of North La Brea Avenue, Los Angeles. With every purchase, the store was offering free delivery and a stylish black face mask that says, “Corona Free Herbarium.”

On Sunday the governor ordered bars, breweries, wineries and wine-bars closed until further notice.

Maybe that’s why there was a run on Everclear 120-proof grain alcohol at the Culver City Bev Mo. Or maybe not. Since hand sanitizer is missing from store shelves because of hoarding, 120-proof grain alcohol may do the trick.

“Normally, we sell a few bottles of that stuff a week,” store manager Paul Pabich said. “But word is spreading fast that at 120 proof, or 60% alcohol, it can kill any germ there is out there. We had 24 bottles in stock on Monday, and they were all sold by Thursday.”

Nodding appreciatively to an empty shelf reserved for bottles of Everclear that sell for $19.99 each, he shrugged and added, “It’s the way of the world right now, and we’re making a little money from it.”

Just don’t drink it before buying a gun. Martin B. Retting in Culver City was doing a booming business over the weekend. For one of the most inhospitable places in the U.S. for gun ownership, this was an interesting sight:

If you thought the lines at the grocery store are long… good morning from Los Angeles 🌴 pic.twitter.com/NudGqwW4I2

— CJ Johnson (@cjjohnsonjr) March 14, 2020

They’ll have to wait a few days to be able to get their guns after mandatory background checks.

You can hardly blame people for wanting to arm-up to protect their toilet paper. Everywhere you look, the shelves for paper products are empty.

Why are people fighting for toilet paper? Use your shower head pic.twitter.com/yX66ZrXmzU

— JOSEPH 🪐 (@drippyloop) March 15, 2020

If people are willing to look ridiculous hoarding toilet paper they may be willing to fight to keep it.

God bless pic.twitter.com/71EKcFfYHK

— Stacy Parker LeMelle (@StacyLeMelle) March 14, 2020

But as with everything at the grocery stores, supplies are on their way:

DO NOT PANIC! Further #ToiletPaper is on its way. Hats off to this lorry driver on the M1! 👏👏👏😂😂😂 #ToiletPaperPanic #ToiletPaperApocalypse @velvet pic.twitter.com/tA0pxoMuOt

— Henry Naylor (@MrHenryNaylor) March 14, 2020

And it looks like the supply of toilet paper made it to this Costco. Where is this, by the way? Asking for a friend.

Performance art by #Costco to mock human stupidity while pocketing some more profits😆 #ToiletPaperPanic #toiletpaper pic.twitter.com/6Zq2YQTrxM

— Elvis K (@President46Yang) March 15, 2020

For those of you stuck at home, but have toilet paper, some enterprising person has developed a work-out regimen for you:

Home workout ideas #corona #workout #toiletpaper pic.twitter.com/U4vtK9X5pr

— Taavi Metsma (@fysioviis) March 13, 2020

Whoever did this deserves a nod of approval:

There’s no rule that says you must undergo sense-of-humor bypass surgery in times of national turmoil.

Now buck up. Take care of yourself. Help others. Buy stuff. We’ve got a country to save.