Culture

No, Baby Yoda Is Not 'Canceled' Because Humorless Wet Blankets Say So

A Baby Yoda doll, by Mattel, is displayed at Toy Fair New York, in the Javits Convention Center, Monday, Feb. 24, 2020. From Baby Yoda to eco-friendly stacking rings, toymakers displayed an array of goods that they hope will be on kids' wish lists for the holiday 2020 season. The four-day Toy Fair comes as the U.S. toy industry has been whipsawed by a number of obstacles. (AP Photo/Richard Drew)

Believe it or not, America’s favorite baby is under attack. It seems inconceivable that anyone could find fault with the squeezable Baby Yoda from Disney’s wonderful Star Wars spin-off, “The Mandalorian,” but here we are. Vanity Fair reported a kerfuffle online after last week’s episode featuring a frog alien carrying unfertilized eggs that Baby Yoda enjoyed slurping down like fine caviar. Children everywhere, including in my own living room, squealed with laughter and delight at the naughty baby’s antics, but the perpetual spoiled children in the social-justice warrior crowd were not amused.

The Mandalorian plays this for gross-out laughs—but a contingent of fans on Twitter has taken the actions seriously, expressing anger and sadness that the series would make light of something that is both a personal invasion and a potential extinction-level event. That has been countered by many others, who feel this comical sci-fi storyline is being taken too seriously.

“I just wanna know who thought this was a good idea. Like… ‘we have this woman whose species is facing extinction and she’s very protective of these her eggs.’ ‘We should have Baby Yoda eat them.’ ‘Hey yay dude, bro high five’ Like what????” one Twitter user posted on Nov. 9. (Vanity Fair is excluding links to protect people from potential harassment.)

“Gosh, Baby Yoda is losing the charm,” another posted on Nov. 6. “I hated him because he ate the eggs of a lady frog and her species. IT’S AN EXTINCTION!!!!”

Seriously, we are not going to let you cancel Baby Yoda so, back off. 

I would be willing to bet that the people who are angry at Baby Yoda for eating unfertilized frog eggs have no problem with aborting a human baby up to the day of birth, so I am not in the mood for moralizing over an amphibious snack. Let’s forget for a moment that this is a fictional fantasy story meant only for entertainment, and no actual embryos were harmed in the making of it, but unless these people are all vegans, then they should shut up. All creatures eat something else to survive. That’s the way of the world. If you’re still not over it by the time you’re old enough to post on social media, then maybe you should move to a yurt in the middle of nowhere, without WiFi, and live on the plants of the fields. Don’t people have enough to worry about in 2020?

Vanity Fair may have realized they overstepped the bounds of acceptability with their article entitled “Baby Yoda is Canceled Amid Accusations of Genocide,” because they’ve updated it, rescinding their cancelation.

UPDATE: In the latest episode, which dropped Friday morning, Baby Yoda himself was swallowed alive by a giant sea creature, learning a valuable lesson about what it’s like to be the appetizer. It ended with him playing nice with one of Frog Lady’s new pollywogs. Given the redemptive turn, it appears his cancellation has itself been canceled.

No. Sorry. That’s not what happened. Even if Baby Yoda did not have the cute scene with the frog parents and their new spawn, we would not be canceling Baby Yoda for eating what a Baby Yoda eats. That’s insane. I wonder if these people have ever watched a nature show. They would be really freaked out watching a lion hunt.

The fact that Vanity Fair decided to publish a couple of unhinged outrage-potatoes’ complaints about fictional amphibious “genocide” proves we have been too long without hard times in America. You would think that the Chinese WuFlu pandemic would have hardened most of us up by now, but it appears not. There’s still time and opportunity to get upset about a fictional character. The good news is, the pandemic must not be that bad or no one would be spending any time hyperventilating about Baby Yoda’s eating habits.

On another note, some of my colleagues didn’t appreciate that episode, either, but it had nothing to do with the egg-eating baby. Instead, their complaints centered around the attack of the spider-like creatures that, for them, were too earth-like and not alien enough. But from my perspective, I was thrilled that Disney remembered that its audience is also made up of children. There’s plenty in “The Mandalorian” for adults, but the kids have to have some fun too. I haven’t seen my children scream that loud or laugh that much in a long time. We thought it was a wonderful romp of jump-scares and gross-out laughs that we all needed.

The bottom line is, don’t mess with Baby Yoda. We will not let you. America has been through enough nonsense and right now, America’s baby is a lone bright spot in a very tough year. Humorless wokescolds have done enough to ruin our fun and enjoyment of life. You’re not winning this one, so quit trying.