Her Eyes Are Blinking “H-E-L-P” in Morse Code
A quick respite from the political news slog has been delivered unto us from the most unlikely of places. Peloton — the indoor workout bike that runs around fourteen and a half million dollars — has released a Christmas with a creep factor so high that it has people reaching across the aisle in agreement about its awfulness.
Take a look:
Allahpundit shared his thoughts about the ad at Hot Air:
The weird part is the … eagerness with which she shows her gratitude. It’s lovely to be grateful for an expensive gift, but she’s *really* grateful and *really, really* wants her husband to know it. It’s not just that she feels compelled to record herself using the bike repeatedly over a span of many months. She looks curiously anxious doing it, even when smiling into the camera. At the end of the clip, when she finally shows him the footage, her eyes are trained on his reaction, seemingly desperate for his approval.
Is, um… How do I put this?
Is everything okay between these two?
Bike Wifey appears to be a smidge under duress as she’s shooting her David Lynchian exercise diary for hubby.
HuffPo has a post about it that features some choice NSFW Twitter responses.
Honestly, after weeks of nothing but impeachment news, Peloton may have just saved America’s collective sanity by letting this be the focus of a post-long-weekend Monday. This fictional frightened woman’s yearlong journey to lose the 14 ounces of water weight that her husband the good Doctor Mengele insists she musts is the Christmas miracle that a news-weary world needs.
And on that topic, I will leave you with this:
— Commander Pebbles 🗑️🐼 (@PebblesCousin) December 3, 2019
Speaking of Creepy Husbands
Mr. Kellyanne Conway and his seventeen chins are now harassing his wife on Twitter.
From the Mothership and Beyond
New Greta On The Shelf Doll Will Track Your Climate Sins https://t.co/1et4MwBkG8
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) December 2, 2019
The Kruiser Kabana
A little music today…
They didn’t have to kill Ironman.
PJ Media Associate Editor Stephen Kruiser is the author of “Don’t Let the Hippies Shower” and “Straight Outta Feelings: Political Zen in the Age of Outrage,” both of which address serious subjects in a humorous way. Monday through Friday he edits PJ Media’s “Morning Briefing.”