PJ Media

Fascism Descends on America's Shopping Malls

This is serious, folks. Overnight one of the fifty states of the glorious U.S. turned into Nazi territory.

It may be possible that a policeman in Arizona is asking for your papers.

This is like being deported to the gulag.

Yesterday, the girl at the Best Buy register did the same. After I gave her my credit card, she asked for my papers. I obliged, fearing extradition to Arizona.

A couple of weeks ago, the Gap had this great jeans sale, and I bought three pairs (they were discounted 30% or so). The man at the register asked for my papers after I handed him my credit card. At that time I didn’t know what was going on in Arizona, but I now realize that I escaped an awful fate.

It is clear: Best Buy and the Gap are neo-Nazi strongholds. Why would they ask for my papers?

I once ran a red light in downtown L.A. — unfortunately, in front of a patrol car. They asked for my papers. It now dawns upon me: it was like being waterboarded.

These days, in Arizona, the police can stop you and ask for your papers. Undocumented individuals face terrible consequences. They can be deported to the gulag, or worse — to their country of origin. This may be a country we go to when we like to have an exotic vacation. These undocumented individuals cherish their country of origin; they wave the flag of their country of origin. They are proud of it. But they don’t want to live there. They want to go there on vacation.

They want to live among the Yankees, documented or undocumented, and only want to visit their country of origin on a vacation trip.

So the following may now happen in Arizona: policemen can ask for your papers.

This is a mind-blowing law — nowhere else in the world would the police ask for your papers.

We, people of good will, need to save the undocumented individuals who run the risk of being sent back to their cherished country of origin. We have to set up places of refuge for these people all over Arizona — for instance, in the churches.

And we have to send buses from San Francisco and migrate these unfortunate undocumented people to the Golden Gate city.

No doubt, many San Franciscans will open up their homes for these poor people. Unfortunately, I don’t live in San Francisco. Otherwise I would have asked an undocumented family to stay with us for as long as President Obama needs to overturn the fascist “papers” law.

It will make a huge difference when well-known San Franciscans like Nancy Pelosi and Mayor Gavin Newsom open their lovely homes for the persecuted undocumented individuals in Arizona. These progressive San Franciscans should lead the way. We really should see hundreds — thousands! — of buses heading to Arizona for the sole purpose of evacuating the undocumented and bringing them to San Francisco and Berkeley. There, many progressive families will warmly welcome them, show them the guest rooms, and prepare a healthy meal.

We need to make clear to Arizona that securing the border is fascist, racist, and xenophobic. Therefore, we need to create a safe highway corridor connecting Arizona to San Francisco. The undocumented will find a generous city in which no one will ever ask for their papers — unless they dare buy a box of batteries with a credit card at a neo-Nazi stronghold.

I plead with Ms. Pelosi and Mr. Newsom: show your best side and give shelter to a couple of undocumented Arizonans who are now being threatened by the Arizona Senate to be sent back to their cherished country of origin, which is worse than the Soviet gulag.

Please, Nancy and Gavin and all you progressive San Franciscans of good will, show your colors and take in an undocumented family! They come from countries we love to go to on vacation and buy second homes in — but to these undocumented, it’s truly the gulag. They cherish it when they wave flags, but they hate to live there apart from a couple of weeks when they have a holiday.

And now the Nazis have taken over Arizona: they want to uphold the law, which is truly fascist.

San Francisco, come and save the poor undocumented in Arizona! It’s like saving Jews from Hitler.