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Morning Pages: A Secret To Finding Your ‘Self’ Behind the Lies

"If you want to work on your art, work on your life." -- Chekhov

by
Rhonda Robinson

Bio

May 6, 2014 - 8:00 am
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Self

Part 1: Finding My Way Back To Creativity, And The Heart of My Daughter

Part 2: 2 Indispensable Tools For Blocked Writers and Closet Artists

Part 3: Want to Kill The Dragon That Ate Your Dreams and Your Socks?

Part 4: What We Owe Rockwell, Orwell and the God of Creation

Part 5: Anger Is An Agent For Change. So Why Control It?

Part 6: How to Attract And Keep A Muse In Your Creative Life

We really do learn to lie from a very young age.

One particular toddler of mine, removed her diaper, wet the floor and blamed it on the dog. I’ve had children become adept liars before they could string three word sentences together. Are my children natural born liars? In a word yes.

As adults, we have to learn how to be truthful. Or better still, we learn when to be truthful–when it doesn’t pay to lie. That’s not to say, that all lies are for sinister reasons.

We become masters at lying to protect our inner selves. It’s a built-in protection mechanism. Who we really are, our deepest feelings and thoughts are kept hidden only to be revealed to our inner circle of close family and friends.

Children master the craft of protecting their inner selves. In high school teens learn to craft the acceptable persona for school, and often another to present to parents.

“By the time we grow up we become masters at dissimulation, at cultivating a self that the world cannot probe. But we pay a price. After years of turning people away, of protecting our inner self, of cultivating it by living in a different world, of furnishing this world with our fantasies and dreams–lo and behold we find that we are hopelessly separated from everyone else. We have become victims of our own art.” —  Ernest Becker

Not only do we protect our inner self from the world–we protect it from our harshest critic–our own minds.

We pretend something doesn’t bother us, that our feelings are not hurt. We lie to ourselves about how important our dreams are, and the real reason we are angry.

If we want to take our creativity to the next level, as with any deep relationship, complete honesty with our inner self is a must.

Peeling back those layers aren’t as frightening as you might think. What you unleash might surprise you.

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All Comments   (3)
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"The best sandbox I have to play in is my own mind." HH of Oz

I'm adopting this thought into my daily life.
14 weeks ago
14 weeks ago Link To Comment
My journey to productive creativity began a number of years ago when I married into a very forthright and opinionated family. The process by which I looked inside and came to understand why I think the way I do allowed me to also see others and the way that they think. This in-depth character study has brought life to my stories and openness to my life.
You have to learn the basics of how things connect - lines in art, and motivations in character - before you can imitate life. The best sandbox I have to play in is my own mind.
15 weeks ago
15 weeks ago Link To Comment
I loved the term your used, "productive creativity." Then I read, "when I married into a very forthright and opinionated family..." I had to double check the name for fear it was one of my son-in-laws commenting.

You are so right. But I never connected the two-- the lines in art and the motivations in character...they really are the same. Thank you for that analogy and taking the time to leave such a thought provoking comment.
14 weeks ago
14 weeks ago Link To Comment
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