When you read that a city spent nearly a million dollars on a sidewalk, you probably figure that it must be one pretty long sidewalk, be made out of ethically sourced artisanal concrete, or maybe feature safety rails (I dunno) made from gold-pressed latinum.
But then you read that the sidewalk in question was made for San Bernardino, Calif., and financed with oodles of unaccountable money from Presidentish Joe Biden's signature Infrastructure Investment and Jobs Act, and you wonder, "Oh no, what did they do?"
To find out, first we need to backtrack to one of the more ambitious-sounding programs buried within the Infrastructure Wasteitude and Jobs Act, called the Carbon Reduction Program, or CRP.
You might think — there I go again — that the Carbon Reduction Program would do things like plant trees, which do an admirable job of sequestering carbon while also being pretty. Or maybe provide funds to install more carbon capture and storage units around the nation's countless natural gas processing plants.
I mean, if you're into carbon reduction — which was all the rage during the Biden administration — those sound like worthy efforts. But then you remember that the Infrastructure Wasteitude and Phony-Baloney Jobs Act was little more than a regulatory orgy and a 1.2 TRILLION DOLLAR slush fund for various Democrat cronies and hangers-on, and you wonder, "Oh no, I bet they did something really stupid."
Which, yes.
The Economic Policy Innovation Center (EPIC) explained earlier this year that CRP was allocated "an estimated $6.4 billion" to spend on carbon-reducing projects like "advanced traffic monitoring and control systems, vehicle-to-infrastructure communications equipment, and rapid bus transit lanes throughout the country."
At least, I'm told those things reduce carbon emissions. I honestly don't know. But I'm certain we could have put a bigger dent in carbon by spending the $6.4 billion on cruise missiles and taking out a couple hundred Chinese coal plants. But I digress.
"Instead," EPIC reported to absolutely no one's surprise, "this money has gone to local infrastructure projects such as sidewalks and trails."
Nobody even tried to tell me those things reduce carbon emissions, but pedestrian stuff and hiking trails are beloved of Democrat voters — and what was I just telling you about the Infrastructure Wasteitude and Phony-Baloney Jobs Debt-Exploder being nothing more than a Democrat slush fund?
Behold, the $961,000 Del Rosa Ave. Sidewalk Project, courtesy of the San Bernardino County Public Works, where they totally aren't addicted to federal tax dollars and can quit anytime.
Somehow, the utility pole made that tiny bit of sidewalk eligible for your CRP tax dollars. Assuming you paid a couple of guys $125,000 each for a day’s work and bought the concrete at retail, you’d still have more than half a million dollars left to explain.
And Another Thing: The folks at Reason released a cute video on this yesterday, which is what brought the story to my attention.
But here's the important thing, and it isn't where your money went.
Californians get to pat themselves on the back because they didn’t blow $961,000 on a few square feet of sidewalk; they wisely invested $961,000 combating climate change, global warming, tectonic plate movement, or whatever it is they’re all fighting like real tough soldiers this week.
With other people's money, naturally.
Recommended: SHOCK REPORT: The New York Times Almost Has Standards
Nope, no million-dollar sidewalks here.
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