Welcome to Insanity Wrap, your weekly dose of the best of the worst. COVID sense breaking out in Colorado is the new big crazy.
- Train your infant not to touch, impress your Woke friends
- Liquor prices up, availability down, just when you needed it most
- It’s a Kamala Harris Caption Contest!
Before we get to today’s big story, here’s a short video to make you lose whatever little faith you might still have in humanity.
This Is Not a Sane World, Exhibit #1,000,006
This baby is adorable. Praying for him. This video is beyond parody pic.twitter.com/K91JLJ6951
— Libs of Tik Tok (@libsoftiktok) December 13, 2021
We live in an age of mass hysteria. Several of them, actually.
Shall we skip right ahead to the good news?
COVID Sense Breaks Out in… Democrat-Dominated Colorado?
Colorado is one of several once-sensible states where the sensible people’s political wishes have been crowded out by Entirely Woke and/or Progressive Democrats in one or two big cities.
Boulder and Denver are cordially invited at any time to bite us and have been for years.
That’s why Insanity Wrap is so pleased — although not entirely pleased — with our Big Woke Governor, Jared Polis right now.
“The emergency is over,” Polis said about the COVID pandemic.
“But that’s not something that you require,” he said about masks. “You don’t tell people what to wear. You don’t tell people to wear a jacket when they go out in winter and force them to [wear it]. If they get frostbite, it’s their own darn fault.”
Insanity Wrap’s main beef with Polis is that he just isn’t very bright. He’s one of those people who seems to sincerely believe the most recent thing somebody told him.
That’s probably why Polis partly walked back those fine words just as soon as he got a good talking-to back at the office.
But here in Colorado, yes, the “emergency” is over.
Just like it is for most people in most places.
The only ones who are still panicked are the ones who want to be, and the politicians who still think they can get the rest of us to conform.
Insanity Wrap hopes that all those outdoor-mask-wearing young, healthy Karens and Kyles will someday look back on this time with an embarrassed “What the hell were we thinking!”
Meanwhile, in Washington…
Maskless Jake Tapper sits maskless next to Amy Klobuchar and slams Ted Cruz for sitting maskless next to Amy Klobuchar. pic.twitter.com/WSfajWtBP4
— The Post Millennial (@TPostMillennial) December 12, 2021
Honest Question: Is Washington filled with idiots and mediocrities, or mediocrities who think we must all be idiots?
Insanity Wrap needs to know.
Now They’ve Gone Too Far
There is literally nothing Presidentish Joe Biden can’t ruin:
At Bob’s Market in Santa Monica, liquor and wine buyer Rick Rosenbloom hefted a 750-milliliter bottle of Veuve Clicquot Brut, one of the store’s most popular brands of Champagne.
“A month ago, this was selling for $52 a bottle,” Rosenbloom said Wednesday. “Today, it’s $69.99, and we’re losing money on it.”
It’s not your imagination. Supply-chain problems as well as higher energy and material costs mean that traditional year-end holiday liquor runs are putting a much bigger dent in your wallet than in 2020.
Plus: “That’s if you’re lucky enough to find your favorite libations. Empty shelves are common for the most popular brands of wine, beer and spirits, with alcoholic beverages running about 11% out of stock in U.S. ”
So we have the Fed printing up imaginary trillions while Congress passes absurd laws, the White House issues productivity-crushing edicts, and the Secretary of Transportation is AWOL on the transportation emergency.
And now you’re telling Insanity Wrap we might not even be able to drown our government-mandated sorrows with an affordable bottle of our favorite beverage?
— Mrs. Brassenstein (@MBrassenstein) December 13, 2021
Insanity Wrap has no idea who took this staged shot of Alleged Vice President Kamala Harris and turned it into a stock photo, but honestly, we’d like to kiss them on the lips for it.
Unless they happen not to be female and (preferably) attractive. In that case, a pat on the back and a hearty “Atta boy!” will have to do.
But we would like to announce the First-Ever Insanity Wrap Caption Contest*.
(Unless we’ve done this before.)
Hit us up with your best captions in the comments section.
Insanity Wrap’s own modest entry: “I told them I was calling the King of Guatemala!”
*No award promised or implied. All decisions are final.
The Craziest Stupidest Person in the World (This Week) Ever
Biden’s “solution” to inflation is to spend another THREE TRILLION dollars we don’t have while encouraging people not to work and strangling productivity with webs of new regulations.
Build Back Better is the equivalent of putting out fire with a multistage thermonuclear weapon — or it would be if there were any Washington Democrats who gave a damn about inflation or any other ill effects.
Democrats are enjoying Late-Stage Democracy, where the only justification for their existence is to get elected just long enough to raid the Treasury for all its worth, impose what they can of their miserable will on the rest of us, and damn the consequences.
Insanity Wrap drank our breakfast today.
We’ll be drinking our lunch.
Previously On Insanity Wrap: Media Frenzy Over ‘White Supremacy’ Protest Hyped by AI FaceBot (Really)
One More Thing…
Because on the inside, Insanity Wrap is still only this many [holds up eight fingers] years old.
That’s a Wrap for today.
Come back next week for another Insanity Wrap…
…assuming we make it that long.
If you enjoy Insanity Wrap, Stephen Kruiser’s Morning Briefing, and headline news from PJ’s growing stable of writers, you’ll love our exclusive content — like video podcasts and live chats with your favorite PJ personalities — available just to our VIP members.
PJ Media VIP members also enjoy an ad-free experience and, for GOLD members similar exclusives at all six Townhall news sites.
You can become a supporter right here with a 25% discount if you use the INSANITYWRAP promo code. We’d love to have you on board.