A Rather Long Wait

My watch says 3:04pm Mountain.


I haven’t been stood up like this since 1988.


While we’re all sitting here waiting, check out Sean Kirby’s latest. He’s off haitus, but still in his pajamas.


“Waiter, more breadsticks, please? I’m sure she’s just stuck in traffic.”


Did you know that SpellCheck doesn’t know the “interruptus” part of “coitus interruptus?” It suggests “interrupt us” as a replacement.

Please, Dan, go on and interrupt us already. It’d be no bother.


“And another glass of water, if you would please, waiter.”


The Comments section is usually funnier than I am. Here’s a sample to get you amused:

Maybe they’re going to announce a new show: 60 (more) Minutes (please).

Dear Viewers,

Please excuse Danny’s sloppy reporting. He came down with the flu when he was supposed to be checking his facts, and he ran out of time. It will not happen again.

Epstein’s Mother

I know what’s happening — the statement announcing a pending statement was FORGED.

How about replacing “60 Minutes” with “45 Minutes”.