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'Sleep' Wasn't on the List of My Recent Airbnb's Amenities

AP Photo/Bebeto Matthews, File

As many readers here know, I was in New York last week to attend my daughter's graduation from law school. I have a couple of hotels in Manhattan that I've frequently stayed at over the years, but my daughter lives in Brooklyn now. I decided to give the Airbnb experience a try for the first time. 

I've been home almost a week and I'm still trying to catch up on sleep from that. 

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Please bear in mind as you read this that I am no travel neophyte. I've spent a good chunk of my adult life on the road, staying in hotels or "comedy condos," which is what any non-hotel accommodations that clubs provide for the comics are called. These were rarely "lap of luxury" situations, given that most comedy club owners are notoriously cheap when it comes to amenities for the talent. 

I've slept in some places where I was sure that the bedsheets spoke several languages, so I wasn't really being that adventurous in taking the Airbnb plunge. I have friends who have been doing the Airbnb thing for years, both here and abroad, and they all rave about it. 

Well, I'm too exhausted to rave. 

The bed in this place was only slightly softer than a marble countertop and was accompanied by an absolute brick of a pillow. The house itself was nice enough, and the neighborhood was quiet, so I should have been able to sleep quite nicely if a bed that was made for a human had been provided. This thing was so uncomfortable that it could have roused someone from a coma. I kept waking up around 5 AM each day and staring at the bare bulb ceiling light, which, oddly, wasn't featured prominently in the photos. 

As for the photos, I will say that the host is a brilliant photographer. I just went back and looked at the pictures of the room I stayed in and it looks about 1000 percent better than what it really is. You can't even tell that the "bedding" is a thin jailhouse sheet and cheap throw from a discount store that's masquerading as a blanket. 

Actually, I've had better jailhouse sheets.

I won't even get into the bathroom situation because this is a family site. 

Anyway, all the lessons were learned. I will probably try it again, but only for a couple of nights, not five. Or I'll try Vrbo and get a place to myself. I would like to do some international travel early next year and want to get a comfortable, very remote work situation. 

Yes, I did write a review on Airbnb and stuck to the facts, which weren't pretty. Obviously, there was more I needed to get out of my system. 

The upside to the whole trip was that I've never been more proud of my daughter and I have a Brooklyn dive bar favorite I'll be frequenting every time I'm back there from now on.

Maybe they'll let me sleep there. 

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