I'm All-In if Trump Promises a Scorched-Earth Second Term

AP Photo/Charlie Neibergall

Like it or not, the 2024 presidential race is about to get underway. If I were to ever run, it would be solely on a platform that promises to reduce the length of presidential election cycles in this country.


Donald Trump is the only declared candidate on the Republican side, and there are no doubt millions of voters on the right who would like to see it stay that way. A lot of people are talking about Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis running. Ron DeSantis isn’t one of them, however, so there’s no need to speculate too much about how that would work.

Those of us who voted for Trump in 2020 had certain expectations and dreams about what he might accomplish in a second term. When it came to policy and judges, it was a great presidency. More of that was greatly anticipated.

After the nightmare, anomaly-laden pseudo election that the nation suffered through, I have something new on my wish list for Trump’s return to the Oval Office: revenge.

Yeah, I still want a return to sound fiscal and foreign policy, but there was something missing from his first term that I really want him to focus on in term two. His swamp-draining efforts were not impressive after all the promises that he made about doing it. It started off well when he fired James Comey so quickly, but then stalled after that. I’ve written many times that I was disappointed that he didn’t gut the FBI, which is now hyper-focused on making trouble for anyone who supports him.


Good times.

After all of the Beltway backstabbing that Trump endured from both sides of the aisle, I sincerely hope that if he returns, it is with a single-minded focus on righting wrongs, real or imagined. I told a friend of mine the other day that I want him to show up to his second inauguration wearing nothing but a codpiece and carrying a flamethrower. Just to set the tone.

Trump is going to have to greatly minimize the unforced errors and distractions of his first term — especially the staffing issues. If his own corner of the Swamp is constantly draining itself and demanding his attention, he isn’t going to have the time or focus to drain the nastier parts of it. Find a chief of staff who knows what he or she is doing, then put the whole thing on autopilot while you take a machete to the rest of the bureaucracy, Mr. President.

Trump will have to undo the mountain of socialist executive actions that President LOLEightyonemillion has saddled us with, but I’m sure he won’t waste any time getting to that. He may skip the inaugural balls just to get on task.

This scorched-earth political dream of mine isn’t new. I’ve long been hoping for a president who had zero you-know-whats to give showing up in Washington and making everyone nervous. What I liked most about Trump when he first got into office was that he wasn’t a career politician with connections that he needed to massage. We didn’t need to worry about him wearing an ascot and “Harumphing” with the old guard GOP types at the Capitol Hill Club.


Of course, the scorched-earth president plan works better with two terms. He could have gotten a better start during the first term, but that’s water under one of the Swamp bridges. I get excited just thinking about Orange Man Bad sweeping back into Washington and seeing the whole place covered in flop sweat.

A lot of people in both parties complained about all of Trump’s rough edges when he was in office. I always thought they were features rather than bugs. If he is heading back into office in January 2025, I hope they’re even rougher.

And I really do like the flamethrower idea.

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