He changed his birth name and became world-famous, rising to the top of his profession. His mother was born in Ohio, but her Kentucky roots — i.e., Appalachia — left an indelible imprint. His best-selling memoir, which spoke candidly about the throes of addiction and its soul-crushing culture, was the talk of the town.
At least for a little while.
Once upon a time, he hated Donald Trump. Absolutely, positively despised the man, hurling disgusting, over-the-top invectives. (Nor was he enthusiastic about the MAGA movement, declaring “Anyone but Trump” and calling himself a “constitutional Republican.”) But later, he changed his mind, striking a much more conciliatory tone — even criticizing his own relatives who bashed the president.
And his audience loved him. Couldn’t get enough. He could do no wrong.
I’m speaking, of course, of Charlie Sheen.
For a couple of years, he had it all. And if he had simply kept his head down, worked hard, and resisted negative influences, who knows how far he could’ve gone?
But he didn’t. His lack of judgment was astonishing: It was one miscalculation after another. (Especially on social media, where his ill-advised posts got him in boiling-hot water.)
Until, finally, his boss got tired of his bull-feces and pulled the plug. And that was it.
His firing was a PR disaster. A public humiliation! And before long, his role was given to someone else.
I’m speaking, of course, of JD Vance.
My favorite Vance-Sheen similarity: The vice president was mentored by Tiger Mom; Charlie Sheen’s veins are flowing with tiger blood. (Could be coincidence, could be a chilling prophecy. I report, you decide.)
Like they say in the NFL, the best ability is availability. You can’t win if you can’t play. That's because presidential politics isn’t the 40-yard dash; it’s a long, brutal, unforgiving marathon. You aren’t a sprinter — you’re an endurance runner.
Victory doesn’t go to the fastest car on the track. It goes to the one that survives the race, usually because the driver had the judgment, foresight, and mental toughness to avoid disaster. ‘Cause you can’t win if you crash and burn.
Discipline beats pole position almost every time.
Which takes us to the most jaw-dropping article of 2026: Someone close to Vance, it seems, appeared in a Politico article to give the stupidest, most tone-deaf political advice imaginable.
JD Vance sees an opening in the post-election blame game: Republican hawks are attacking him for opposing the war, Democrats promise retribution — and he’s planning to use both to prove he’s the anti-establishment voice in Washington.
Vance allies say the attacks could help him recast the MAGA brand after the midterms and rally voters who soured on the war President Donald Trump launched the U.S. into.
[…]
Those swings from “JD’s critics are doing the job for him,” a person close to Vance told Playbook.
“Unpopular DC insiders criticizing him for not being a sufficient enough war hawk is not necessarily a bad thing for him politically and sends the right signal to our base,” the person said. “These people are doing the lord’s work as far as I’m concerned.”
It’s a stunningly self-serving, me-first strategy: separate Vance from President Trump, openly feud with GOP “hawks” to consolidate the anti-war isolationist vote, cause so much intraparty chaos and conflict that your enemies badly outnumber you on the campaign trail — and then ride the New Right to the Republican nomination.
That’s the war plan:
An embattled Vance will encourage other Republicans to join the field, and play into his strategy for 2028, the [unnamed] person told Playbook.
“We want as many people to jump in to divide up the anti-JD vote,” the person said. “The worst thing would be a two or three-way. It would be much more of a fight.”
If JD Vance was just a Senator, it would be one thing. A chaos-agent within the party would still be problematic, but it would be somewhat excusable: Politics is a tough business, and sometimes you need sharp elbows to rise to the top. So if Sen. Vance wanted to run for president as the anti-war, anti-establishment candidate, bully for him.
But today, he’s the vice president of the United States of America — and a member of the president’s cabinet. He works in the White House.
That’s the job he was elected to do!
And I’m sorry, but you can’t be the anti-establishment candidate when you’re part of the establishment. Republican voters expect the vice president to help Trump succeed — not further divide our party because it’s politically advantageous.
It was also frickin’ moronic to gloat about Vance’s strategy to Politico: Placing his personal ambition ahead of the administration’s success is gross. It certainly won’t win him many new fans.
In fact, it’ll probably cost him votes. Millions and millions of Republican votes. So many votes that he might not even run in 2028: According to CNN today, Vance is now “reconsidering his political future.”
And yesterday, on Truth Social, President Trump publicly relieved Vance of all foreign policy responsibilities. No longer will he be negotiating with Iran — or anyone else. Going forward, the veep’s “complete and total attention” will be limited to city- and state-level fraud. (The New Yorker wondered, “Can you fire the vice president via Truth Social?”)
It’s a crash-and-burn of Sheenian proportions! Whatever “Winning!” is, this ain’t it!
But if you accept the premise that Vance truly believed he benefited from GOP divisions and antagonizing the “hawks,” his political choices make a lot more sense. From sticking like Velcro to Tucker Carlson to the disastrous MOU to blaming Israel for the midterm defeat, what once came across as odd or misguided is suddenly recast as shrewd and calculating.
So maybe it was all a deliberate strategy. Maybe Vance never intended to unify the party or help Trump succeed. Maybe his #1 goal was building a New Right that propels him to the presidency — and pro-Israel conservatives, “hawks,” and anti-Tucker Carlson voices are dead weight that must be shed.
Recommended: The GOP’s War Plan for Shattering the Democratic Party Coalition in 5 Easy Steps
If that was Vance’s strategy, his plan just exploded in his face. He didn’t come across as “anti-establishment,” but as disloyal, self-serving, and utterly untrustworthy.
It was a huge turnoff.
It’s also inviting his growing number of critics to dig into his claims, which could lead to another slew of embarrassing scandals:
This is the “smartest data guy” @JDVance knows? A guy who is also Nick Fuentes’s favorite pollster and who thinks Fuentes isn’t a Nazi? Are you effing kidding me? No wonder he won’t condemn Tucker. https://t.co/HtP9U58FpH
— Marc Thiessen (@marcthiessen) November 12, 2026
Sen. John Kennedy (R-La.) certainly wasn’t impressed with Vance’s instincts. “I don’t think the vice president did himself any favors by sending out that email or tweet or whatever it was after the election,” he told CNN. “This loss was not because of Iran. That might have played a part, but I don’t think every statewide Republican in Texas lost their election — every single one — because they think American foreign policy is too interventionist. I mean, put down the crack pipe! It’s a lot deeper than that.” [emphasis added]
(Hey, y’know who else had a crack pipe? Right, Charlie Sheen! I’m telling you, it’s UNCANNY!)
Because of all the blowback, JD Vance — if he runs at all — is now the FINO: Frontrunner In Name Only. He’ll still lead the ’28 presidential polls, but that’s mostly due to name recognition and earlier momentum.
But his lead is now illusory, and his numbers are falling fast. According to Polymarket, Vance went from a 53% probability of winning the GOP presidential nomination in September to 32% today. That’s a 20-plus point crash.
He’s the presumptive nominee no longer. The GOP race is wide open.
And maybe that’s exactly what Team Vance wants. Maybe it’s all a cynical, Machiavellian calculation — and in a field of Ron DeSantis, Ted Cruz, Glenn Youngkin, Brian Kemp, and (possibly) Marco Rubio, the pro-Israel Republican majority will be splintered, and JD Vance can ride the isolationist/Carlson bloc to victory. Maybe it’s 4-D chess writ large.
Maybe.
Still, JD Vance should keep in mind the cautionary tale of Two and a Half Men: When Charlie Sheen was fired from the sitcom, the show’s second banana — Jon Cryer — wasn’t suddenly elevated to the leading role.
Just because you’re the next man in line doesn’t mean you’re the best man for the job. That’s not how the world works!
The audience, after all, still saw him as the second banana.
So the show simply recruited a new leading man. And so shall we.
One Last Thing: We lost the midterms, but our fight continues. In many ways, our real fight is just beginning: The radical left has never been so emboldened — or their goals so ambitious.
We need your help to fight back!
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