Politico came up with the scathingly brilliant idea to initiate an awards program to honor those in Washington, D.C., who demonstrate “that unquenchable drive for publicity, attention, and buzz.”
They’re known as the “Thirsties” and for sheer entertainment value, you can’t beat them.
Throw a stone in Washington and you’ll hit five such politicians. But these politicos have actually gone above and beyond in their efforts to get noticed. Take former Rep. Pete Meijer who made opposing Donald Trump a cottage industry of publicity generation. He’s the proud recipient of the “Respectable Republican Award.”
Former Rep. Peter Meijer, [who] voted to impeach a president of his own party immediately after he was sworn into office in January of 2021, happily discussed how courageous it was in a series of glowing pieces with glam portraits and swashbuckling quotes (“To hell with it,” he told one Washington news magazine), lost his primary last year to a MAGA opponent and now is considering a Senate run but won’t rule out voting for the president he voted to impeach.
Or what about professional liberal Rep. Ro Khanna, winner of the “Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop” award.
Rep. Ro Khanna, who never misses a chance for an on-the-record quote in a story that needs a liberal voice, flew back to California to get up at 0-Dark-Hundred so he could use a CNN Sunday show interview to announce in his home state what everyone expected (he’s not running for the Senate) and insists he loves serving in the House even as he earnestly defends the sanctity of New Hampshire’s first-in-the-nation primary ahead of his likely 2028 bid.
Khanna was the only member of Congress to endorse both long-time incumbent Joe Crowley and his opponent in the New York primary, Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.
Then there’s the Donald J. Trump Award presented to Rep. Marjorie Taylor Green for “Pretending to Hate the Media While Simultaneously Craving Their Affirmation.”
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How about “The Amy Klobuchar Lifetime Achievement Award” for “Showing Up at Everything But the Opening of an Envelope”
Sen. Amy Klobuchar, who never fails to show up for D.C. parties that are mostly reporters talking to other reporters, for the Sunday shows, which are a harder sell for other lawmakers not named Manchin, and for banquets that most everybody in the capital dreads going to for the seventh time (who really wants to go the Radio and TV Correspondents’ Dinner again?).
And my personal favorite: “The Forever Thirsty Award,” presented to Newt Gingrich.
Newt Gingrich, who was elected to Congress, on his oh-so-thirsty third try, in 1978 to represent Georgia’s 6th congressional district and later became speaker. He was run out of Congress after the 1998 election. But here we are in 2023, and Newton Leroy Gingrich, nearing 80, is still on Fox (he did satellite hits from Rome when his wife was ambassador to the Vatican!), cranking out his own podcast, annually adding to his ever-growing stack of books and writing a column that still makes news, like when he warned that Republicans were underestimating Biden.
Gingrich is an intelligent guy and writes wonderfully about American history. But he’s way, way past his sell-by date and needs to find a way to bow out gracefully.
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