The Terrorism Quiz

Who, really, is behind the epidemic of global terrorism against civilians? Whom should airport security personnel view carefully—respectfully—but very, very carefully?

A friend just sent me the following “laugh until you cry” quiz. One hopes that the folks screening us at airports are given this quiz and are guided accordingly. Perhaps passengers should carry it with them; as they say: “Don’t leave home without it.”

1. In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, young Israeli athletes were kidnapped and massacred by:

a. Darth Vader

b. Sitting Bull

c. Arnold Schwarzenegger

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

2. In 1979, the US embassy in Iran was taken over by:

a. Lost Norwegians

b. Elvis

c. A tour bus full of 80-year-old women

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

3. During the 1980’s, about 96 Americans and Europeans were kidnapped in Lebanon by:

a. Michael Jackson

b. The King of Sweden

c. The Boy Scouts

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

4. In 1983, the US Marine barracks in Beirut were blown up by:

a. A pizza delivery boy

b. Pee Wee Herman

c. Geraldo Rivera

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

5. In 1985, the cruise ship Achille Lauro was hijacked and a 70-year old American passenger was murdered and thrown overboard in his wheelchair by:

a. The Smurfs

b. Davey Jones

c. The Little Mermaid

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

6. In 1985, TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens, and a US Navy diver trying to rescue passengers was murdered by:

a. Captain Kidd

b. Charles Lindberg

c. Mother Teresa

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

7. In 1988, Pan Am Flight #103 was bombed by:

a. Scooby Doo

b. The Tooth Fairy

c. The Sundance Kid

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

8. In 1993, the World Trade Center was bombed the first time by:

a. Richard Simmons

b. Grandma Moses

c. Michael Jordan

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

9. In 1998, the US embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by:

a. Mr. Rogers

b. Hillary Clinton, to distract attention from Wild Bill’s women problems

c. The World Wrestling Federation

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

10. On 10/12/2000 the USS Cole was blown up and seventeen sailors were murdered by:

a. Brad Pitt

b. The Lutheran Church

c. The NFL

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

11. On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked; two were used as missiles to take out the World Trade Centers and of the remaining two, one crashed into the US Pentagon and the other was diverted and crashed by the passengers. Thousands of people were killed by:

a. Bugs Bunny, Wiley E. Coyote, Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd

b. The Supreme Court of Florida

c. Mr Bean

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

12. In 2002, reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered (beheaded) by:

a. Bonnie and Clyde

b. Captain Kangaroo

c. Billy Graham

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

13. On 10/12/02 two large bombs were detonated in a tourist district of Bali, which murdered 202 people and wounded 240 people; On 3/11/04 the trains in Madrid were blown up, 191 people were murdered, 1800 were wounded; on 7/7/05 the subway system and a bus were blown up in London, 56 were murdered, 700 were wounded; on 3/7/06, a Hindu Temple was bombed in India, 28 people were murdered, 100 were wounded; on 4/11/07, car bombers in Algiers murdered 33 people and wounded 222 people; in 11/ 08, Mumbai endured a massacre which lasted four days and resulted in 173 people being murdered and 308 people being wounded. All these acts were committed by:

a. Tiger Woods

b. Sarah Palin

c. Madonna

d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

14. On 11/5/09, 13 American soldiers were murdered and 31 people wounded at Fort Hood in Texas. This act was committed by:

a. Bart Simpson

b. ET

c. Nancy Pelosi

d. Muslim male extremist between the age of 17 and 40