An Apocalypse of Emo
I think we can trace most of modern American society’s ills back to when men decided to start hugging.
OK, a lot of it can go back to when women began watching football too, but I’ll try to maintain some focus here.
I remember the first time I got a man hug and I wasn’t at a funeral, which used to be the only events at which they were acceptable. I knew that some sort of testosterone-based Pandora’s box had been opened.
The next thing I knew, everyone had feelings and the Super Bowl became less about football and more about making the womenfolk happy with seven-hour-long halftime concerts.
Now I hug a lot, but only because people don’t expect it from me and I know it makes them uncomfortable.
Back in 2015 and 2016 when I was — to put very mildly — a Trump skeptic, I did keep telling people that I didn’t think he posed an existential threat to the Republic. I’m a grown-up who has been through too many false apocalyptic political narratives to fall for them anymore.
In yesterday’s Briefing, we looked at the first installment of a full-court press by the media to woo Republicans to getting behind impeachment. The plea was a predictable one: Trump must be removed from office or the country that survived a civil war, the Soviet Union, and the heresy of New Coke will cease to exist.
That press picked up speed on Monday, with various “save the country” pleas to Republicans — specifically GOP senators — to save the country.
When they’re not making their prom pitches to Republicans with grandiose visions of saving the country, the MSM and Democrats are concern trolling for the future of the GOP.
Jeff Flake — my least favorite former senator — wrote an op-ed for The Washington Post that worried about Republicans’ “souls.”
Nobody’s soul is at stake, especially the GOP’s.
The future of the United States is most certainly not in danger because of anything the president is doing. The hysteria is more boring than agitation-inducing at this point.
Look around you. The world isn’t ending. The United States isn’t in its death throes. The baseball season is ending and that is sad, but we can work through it.
I’m dismissive of my political opponents these days because they’re more in need of diapers than careful consideration of their opinions.
My good friend, Ricochet Editor-In-Chief Jon Gabriel, summed it up rather nicely on Monday:
Impeachment has been the left’s goal since December 2016 — before Trump took office. Ukraine is just another bite of the apple after the Mueller report failed so spectacularly.
The media hysteria over Ukraine feels a lot like the recent Greta hysteria. There’s no time to absorb facts, discuss options, or weigh pros and cons. We need to act now or else!
Hysteria is a poor strategy. It didn’t work for climate change or Kavanaugh or the many other panics we’ve been subjected to since Trump took office. How Trump’s detractors think this will end well is beyond me.
That’s just it: they don’t think. They feel. When that’s all you do, everything is the end of the world.
And when everything is the apocalypse, nothing is the apocalypse.
From the Mothership and Beyond
This is what happens when a case of water falls off the seat of a catering cart and lands on the gas pedal.
— Veronica Miracle (@ABC7Veronica) October 1, 2019
Trump Reveals He's Secretly Been Creating Clone Army In Preparation For Civil Warhttps://t.co/b5ibLZvTHy
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) September 30, 2019
The Kruiser Kabana
THE COLOR-SHIFTING DREAMING OCTOPI CELLS ARE BEING AWAKENED
An octopus changing colors while sleeping has prompted marine biologists to question if it can dream pic.twitter.com/c2mQ12keLa
— Reuters (@Reuters) October 1, 2019
For those of you still getting to know me…
What my exes look like in my nightmares. https://t.co/Xb0xgwVLFx
— SFK (@stephenkruiser) October 1, 2019
If you’ve never eaten pierogi you can’t be trusted with international secrets.
PJ Media Associate Editor Stephen Kruiser is the author of “Don’t Let the Hippies Shower” and “Straight Outta Feelings: Political Zen in the Age of Outrage,” both of which address serious subjects in a humorous way. Monday through Friday he edits PJ Media’s “Morning Briefing.”