News & Politics

National Susan B. Anthony Museum 'Rejects' Trump's Pardon, Somehow

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Before this week, I knew exactly two things about Susan B. Anthony: 1) When I was a kid they put her face on the silver dollar and everybody hated it, and 2) Nothing. Well, I had a vague idea at best. She was some sort of 19th Century proto-feminist who wanted to vote or something like that, and good for her. I think women’s suffrage has been mostly successful, and I bear no outright ill will toward Anthony or any of her fans. Nicely done, ladies.

But then this week, something terrible happened: Donald Trump pardoned her! Over a century after her death and on the 100th anniversary of the 19th Amendment — Happy Anniversary, gals — Trump granted SBA a presidential pardon. And then everybody had to ask: “Alexa, why was Susan B. Anthony imprisoned?” It turns out she was arrested for voting in the 1872 presidential election. Which was wrong, even if she voted for the Republican.

A very old injustice was finally addressed. Better late than never, right?

So you’d think. But suddenly, America’s first SJW became the latest weapon in the war between Trump and the entire Democrat-Media Complex. Up until this week, Susan B. Anthony was good. Now that she’s forever associated with Donald Trump, she’s bad. Or maybe she’s an innocent victim of his evil. Or maybe both? I dunno, they’re still hashing it out. Might take a while.

In the meantime, SBA stans are very concerned that you might think they approve of Trump, and they’re here to set the record straight. Lee Moran, HuffPo:

The museum dedicated to the memory of Susan B. Anthony has on her behalf declined President Donald Trump’s pardon of the late women’s suffrage leader.

The National Susan B. Anthony Museum and House in Rochester, New York, explained in a Twitter thread Tuesday why it objected to Trump’s pardon for Anthony…

Critics accused Trump of performing an empty gesture with the pardon, given his relentless attacks on mail-in voting and baseless allegations of fraud in the 2020 election.

You see, Susan B. Anthony belongs to them. This is all just part of Trump’s plot to turn America into The Handmaid’s Tale. “By His hand” indeed!

Just imagine what a victory for feminism it would’ve been if the first female president had pardoned Susan B. Anthony. I can just picture the gleeful feminist memes if President Hillary had scored this win for them. “Nevertheless, she’s remitted!” “#NotoriousSBA!” It would’ve made them so happy. But not only did Trump keep #ImWithHer from being that president, now he’s stolen that victory from Kamala Harris or any other potential female POTUS. Imagine hating women that much!

Or something along those lines. I try my best, but the murky labyrinth of the liberal mind resists all attempts to map it.

It never occurred to me that somebody would actually reject a presidential pardon, no matter who the president was, but apparently it has happened. It was over 100 years ago, but it happened. I’m pretty sure, though, that this is the first time somebody has rejected a presidential pardon on behalf of somebody else. Posthumously.

How does that work, exactly? Did they send Bill & Ted to see if it was okay with her? Is she un-pardoned now? Should we dig her up and then #LockHerUp? This is uncharted territory.

Look, feminists, a simple “Thank You” would do it. A guy you hate did a good thing, and it’s a good thing no matter how much you hate him. Admitting he did something right doesn’t mean you have to stop hating him. You’re modern women and you can do both. You don’t have to tie yourselves into knots rationalizing your anger because your team gets no credit for this.

Or how about this: Say nothing! Saying nothing is sometimes a good idea.

Relax, calm down. I’m not giving you a command. Just making a suggestion. Sheesh.

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