News & Politics

London Protesters Glue Themselves to Things to Raise Awareness About Climate Change

Climate change is going to kill us all, apparently. And as any protester worth his* unused soap knows, there’s no better way to convince working people that you’re serious about climate change than to interfere with their ability to make a living. You need to stand in traffic, block entrances to office buildings, etc. If you make it tougher for people to get to and from work, they’re much more likely to listen to you. That’s just basic common sense.

Eliza Mackintosh, CNN:

Thousands of people took to the streets of central London on Monday, blockading some of the UK capital’s busiest roads and bridges, and gluing themselves to street furniture, to raise the alarm over a mounting climate crisis…

Protesters were expected to use tactics including gluing or locking themselves to gates, benches, turnstiles and other street furniture to bring intersections and streets to a standstill…

Photos and videos shared on social media showed some protesters outside London’s Shell Centre near Waterloo Bridge on Monday. While some demonstrators glued themselves to the revolving front door, others scrawled Extinction Rebellion’s hourglass symbol in graffiti and smeared black paint on the exterior of the building. The protesters also smashed a glass door.

Epoxy on all of them.

If this doesn’t convince the last few remaining skeptics that there’s a “mounting climate crisis,” nothing will. These guys are definitely raising public awareness that they’re a bunch of buttholes.

Y’know, I used to run around breaking things and playing with glue and paint too. It was called kindergarten.

I just hope this blog post doesn’t get me locked up. British police have been going after people for mean tweets, presumably because they were sitting around bored after stopping all the stabbings and acid attacks. It’s only a matter of time!

*Or her. Or both. Or neither. I’m sorry.