News & Politics

Neil Armstrong Landed on the Moon and Planted an [REDACTED] Flag

Ever notice how much Hollywood* hates America?

Well, maybe that’s overstating the case. “Hate” might be too strong a word for the emotion our moral, ethical, and intellectual betters in Tinseltown feel about the rest of us. It’s more of a vague disgust and an unearned sense of superiority, wrapped up in sheepish apologies for daring to live in the greatest country in the history of the world. That’s the message they keep sending out to the rest of the planet: “Sorry for being so awesome, everybody. We might be in America, but we’re not of America. We’re not like the rest of these ignorant rubes. You guys have some really good countries too!” Hell, why do you think Hollywood loves Obama so much? Every time he apologized to another country, they threw another lavish fundraiser for him.

That’s why the Superman movies went from this:

To this:

“Does he still stand for truth, justice… all that stuff?” In the 21st century, “the American way” is just embarrassing. And it doesn’t play as well overseas.

That’s why Joe Johnston, director of Captain America: The First Avenger, once told the LA Times about the titular superhero: “He’s a guy that wants to serve his country, but he’s not a flag-waver.” That’s right, the fellow who wears the American flag on his uniform and shield, the dude whose name is Captain America, isn’t a “flag-waver.” He’s basically just Captain Person, really. Why get all jingoistic about it?

But erasing American greatness from our fictional characters wasn’t enough. Now Hollywood is doing the same thing to a real-life American hero.

Courtesy of Anita Singh at The Telegraph, here’s what we can expect from the upcoming Neil Armstrong biopic, First Man. The filmmakers left out the part about Armstrong planting the American flag on the moon, and here’s why:

The film… was unveiled at the Venice Film Festival yesterday, where the absence of the stars and stripes was noted by critics.

Its star, Ryan Gosling, was asked if the film was a deliberately un-American take on the moon landing…

Gosling explained: “I think this was widely regarded in the end as a human achievement [and] that’s how we chose to view it. I also think Neil was extremely humble, as were many of these astronauts, and time and time again he deferred the focus from himself to the 400,000 people who made the mission possible…”

“So I don’t think that Neil viewed himself as an American hero. From my interviews with his family and people that knew him, it was quite the opposite.”

Well, one of the things you might notice about people like Neil Armstrong is that they don’t strut around calling themselves heroes. They’re humble. They’re more concerned with getting the job done than getting the glory for it. That’s one of the things that makes them heroes.

And then, the kicker:

Gosling joked: “I’m Canadian, so I might have cognitive bias.”

That’s not really what cognitive bias means, but I suppose that’s all we can expect from the Canadian school system. Hey, at least Armstrong isn’t being played by a Brit or an Aussie or one of those other foreigners coming over here and stealing American jobs…

I’m as skeptical of nationalism as the next cuck RINO NeverTrump traitor, but isn’t this taking things a little too far? The moon landing was a uniquely American achievement, as indicated by the fact that no other country on Earth has ever achieved it. Armstrong didn’t plant an Earth flag. He planted an American flag. It’s still there. That’s what happened. How do you make a movie about the greatest thing he ever did, arguably the greatest thing anybody has ever done, and leave that part out?

Why, because it might turn off audiences in Beijing?

But it could’ve been worse, as a few Internet wags have noted:

But no culture war battle is complete without the inevitable Trump tweet, which will probably be nothing like this parody tweet I just made up:

MAGA: Make America Gosling’s Adversary!

*Or, as I like to call it, Hollyweird.