Mister, We Could Use a Man Like Edward Straker Again

Perhaps sensing this week’s freaky-deaky California contrail as its advance guard, S.E. Cupp writes, “The time for an alien invasion is now:”

Finally, I’ve decided there’s no such thing as extraterrestrial life. Because if there were aliens out there, they’d have recognized that now is the PERFECT time to come down and invade our planet. We have no money. We think burying gold bullion in our backyards is a pretty good investment. We think credits in carbon are actually worth something. We worry about conserving water — something that literally falls from the sky every day. We are professionally distracted, running into walls and lampposts because we refuse to look up from our iPhones. We think marijuana should be available at every gas station, but Happy Meals are killing our kids. And we’ve got unexplained missiles springing up from the ocean. If there were ever time for an alien invasion, it’s now.

Didn’t that already happen? Maureen Dowd was rhapsodizing over President Spock for months after November of 2008 — at least until he morphed into President Barack “you will be absorbed” Landru.