Dr. Helen

The 12 Feminist Days of Christmas

Milo Yiannopoulos has a fun post over at Breitbart.com entitled “The Twelve Days of Feminist Christmas”:

You might think Christmas would be considered by feminists to be a terribly problematic holiday, full of toxic masculinity and patriarchy — they think this about every holiday — but actually they love Christmas, because it’s a day dedicated to receiving gifts. And what does third-wave radical feminism stand for, if not material greed?

The ultimate Christmas song about greed is Santa Baby, but the problem with that tune is the stunning and brave feminist singing doesn’t actually get any of her wishes fulfilled by cruel Father Christmas, who must be too busy keeping women out of STEM fields to fulfil her reasonable request for the deed to a platinum mine.

He does a reboot of the Twelve Gifts song which is humorous. My favorite is:

Three French Hens
Ugh, this is like TOTALLY implying the feminist in your life is cheating on her vegan diet with eggs. On some college campuses this would get you suspended for diet rape. Since the original song mentions the French, our lyric should focus on the new French, also known as Muslim immigrants. Therefore the beta paramour will take the feminist to Three Israel protests.