As millennials take over more and more of American culture, hipsters are looking for places to move to — and the rest of us would like to know which “trendy” haunts to avoid. A new definitive ranking provides a blueprint for the kale-infested lands in the great U.S. of A.
The Hipster Index combines five data points: the number of vegan eateries, coffee shops, tattoo studios, vintage boutiques, and record stores per 100,000 city residents. (Why they didn’t include craft breweries is anyone’s guess.) Combined and weighted, these stats provide a Hipster Index score out of ten for each city.
Some results will surprise you, and others very much will not. Without further ado, here are the top 20 hipster cities in America, according to MoveHub’s Frederick O’Brien.
20. Grand Rapids, Michigan Score: 5.9221
Hipsters likely don’t love Grand Rapids because it was the home of Gerald Ford and is the home of the DeVos family. But yes, hipsters love the city half-built by Betsy DeVos’s family. That’s what you’d call ironic.
19. Knoxville, Tenn. Score: 5.9856
Hipsters have mobbed the old capital of Tennessee. The lovers of all things retro, it stands to reason they’d prefer old Tennessee to the booming Country Music hub of Nashville.
18. New Orleans, La. Score: 6.1399
Jazz, empty plinths where Confederate generals used to stand, and Hipsters! The city that came roaring back from Hurricane Katrina won’t be left in the past, and if the future is kale, New Orleans will be eating it on Bourbon Street.
17. Oakland, Calif. Score: 6.1724
If San Fran is twelfth, imagine how neglected Oakland feels. Tech firms are spilling out into Oakland, and real estate is booming. It stands to reason Hipsterism would keep up.
16. Richmond, Va. Score: 6.1763
Washington, D.C., is way down on the list, but Virginia’s capital city is sixteenth. This is what happens when you don’t include bars or breweries in the rankings…
15. Las Vegas, Nev. Score: 6.1864
Casinos are keeping up with the times…
14. Pittsburgh, Pa. Score: 6.3077
How did Pittsburgh beat Philadelphia?!
13. Rochester, N.Y. Score: 6.3603
The home of Rochester Institute of Technology, this bastion of Hipsterism is also right across from Niagara Falls.
12. San Francisco, Calif. Score: 6.4382
How did San Fran score so low? I think Silicon Valley demands a recount.
11. Atlanta, Ga. Score: 6.5172
Trendiest place in the South…
10. Minneapolis, Minn. Score: 6.5308
Some vegans like it cold.
9. Eugene, Ore. Score: 6.5861
Oregon is Hipster — you don’t say!
8. Tampa, Fla. Score: 6.5927
Tampa is going places, but they may not be places you want to go…
7. Spokane, Wash. Score: 6.6950
Another upper West Coast city like Portland and Seattle. Need I say anything more?
6. Orlando, Fla. Score: 6.8288
Home to Walt Disney World … and vegans!
5. Miami, Fla. Score: 6.8369
Get them some Cuban coffee!
4. Fort Lauderdale, Fla. Score: 6.8527
Yes, Miami’s little sister makes the cut. Between ritzy Palm Beach — home to Mar-A-Lago — and Miami, Fort Lauderdale is a booming destination for a certain type of person…
3. Seattle, Wash. Score: 7.0290
You don’t say? Seattle is perhaps second only to Portland in Hipster association.
2. Salt Lake City, Utah. Score: 7.8527
WHAT?! The capital of Utah, Salt Lake City, smack-dab in the heart of Mormon country, is also top on the Hipster list. Mormons can’t drink coffee, but they do love their music. Salt Lake City is only 51 percent Mormon, after all…
1. Portland, Ore. Score: 8.1631
Naturally, the home of “Portlandia” has to rank number 1 on the Hipster list. This is probably the least surprising result of them all.