West Coast, Messed Coast™ 'Till the Cows Leave Home' Edition

(AP Photo/Charlie Neibergall)

Well, West Coast, Messed Coasters™, it looks like Bessie, Buttercup, Clarabelle, and their male consorts are heading down that big cow path out of California.

According to the Daily Bulletin, the state’s new cow fart laws are forcing long-time ranchers to give up, sell out, or send their herds to other states. These are places where elected leaders don’t hate on residents for wanting a good ribeye or who back a diabolical plan to force you into eating Bill Gates’ Franken-meat. 

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Since passage of that law, the state’s 1,200 dairies have made huge strides in reducing methane emissions. A report this spring by the California Air Resources Board estimated state farms are nearly halfway to the goal.

But while half of those reductions have come from dairies changing the ways they process cow manure, the other half has come because California simply is losing cows. And when cows are moved, global methane emissions don’t actually drop. They just shift, or “leak,” into another state, where lighter regulations mean the greenhouse problems likely will get worse.

One West Coast, Messed Coast™ rancher sold his land to a housing developer.

California continues to lose thundering herds of humans as well. The Babylon Bee takes note of the population trend with a song ditty entitled “I Wish We All Could Leave California (Beach Boys Parody).”

The Bee highlights the lowlights of Golden State peccadillos with homages to mask mandates, homeless camps, elitist hypocrisy, feces-laden streets, and freedom… in Texas and Florida.

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This prompts the question: can we designate the gaseous cloud of smug generated in the West Coast, Messed Coast™ capitals Sacramento, Olympia, and Salem to be considered under the cow fart legislation? It’s worth a try.

And this brings us to Wiener Watch, a new occasional series on the West Coast, Messed Coast™ reports. San Francisco Democrat Senator Scott Wiener, who’s never seen a far-Left idea he didn’t embrace and attempt to force on others, is all-in on his latest gambit to deny tax-exempt status to organizations “that participate in or incite efforts to overthrow the United States government or any state government.”

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Government officials get to define what “insurrection” means, natch.

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Speaking of government officials and free speech, we understand that Calvary Chapel San Jose may have won its reputation back after spurning the COVID mandates demanded by those government officials Scott Wiener likes so much. On Monday, the California Court of Appeals took the jackboot off the neck of the church and its pastors, who were sued for contempt.

Here’s the money quote from the decision:

[W]e conclude that the temporary restraining orders and preliminary injunctions are facially unconstitutional pursuant to the recent guidance of the United States Supreme Court regarding the First Amendment’s protection of the free exercise of religion in the context of public health orders that impact religious practice (see, e.g., Tandon v. Newsom (2021) 593 U.S. __ [141 S. Ct. 1294] (Tandon).)

As the underlying orders which Calvary Chapel violated are void and unenforceable, we will annul the orders of contempt in their entirety and reverse the orders to pay monetary sanctions. (See In re Berry (1968) 68 Cal.2d 127, 140, 157 (Berry).)

The People v. Calvary Chapel San Jose decision came after the church was held in contempt for breaking Gavin Newsom’s and local health officials’ COVID diktats against holding church services without the state’s approval. The government fined the church $3.8 million. The appeals court erased all fines—in California.

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Speaking of surprises, if you want to save lives, put out fires, and be well paid doing it, look no further than the Manhattan Beach fire department.  The California Policy Center reports that the average pay for the MBFD firefighters is $328,000 per year.

Now you might be thinking, “boy, that’s a lot of overtime!” and you’d be right to question it. But check out the sweet overtime deal these guys get.

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The City Council wrote a letter to the local newspaper to set the record straight.

Just because a firefighter receives overtime does not mean they are working time over their regularly scheduled hours.

For example, a firefighter can be on vacation for two shifts but work another shift in the same week and receive overtime. Similarly, two firefighters can work each other’s vacation shifts and receive overtime without working any additional hours. This is because vacation, holiday leave, and injury pay count as “hours worked” to qualify for overtime.

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In Port Townsend, Washington, a feisty 80-year-old woman who’s been swimming laps at the YMCA pool for 35 years was banned from the pool because she didn’t like a man ogling little girls in the ladies’ room.

There’s more at Reduxx Magazine:

[Julie Jaman] witnessed a trans-identified male using the female locker rooms at the pool, and became concerned due to the fact he appeared to be watching the little girls as they changed out of their bathing suits.

“I was showering [after a swim] and I heard a man’s voice… it was quite deep,” Jaman told Reduxx, “So I looked through the shower curtain. There was a man in a woman’s bathing suit, and he was near four or five little girls who were taking off their bathing suits. He was standing there watching them.”

…she quietly asked: “Do you have a penis?” The male refused to answer, prompting Jaman to demand he leave the locker room.

Rowen DeLuna, the pool’s aquatics manager, was in the area at the time, and when Jaman appealed to her to remove the male from the restroom, DeLuna told her she was being “discriminatory” and threatened to call the police.

Jaman was shocked when it was she who was banned from the ladies’ room and swimming complex and not the man. And then she got mad.

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She picketed outside the facility demanding to be allowed to swim laps. Then she went to the local city council meeting.

“The YMCA policies on gender identity use ‘pride’ as a euphemism to prevent discrimination against one group of people but at the expense of another group – women who don’t want to use all-gender bathing or dressing areas,” Jaman said in her address to the Council, continuing: “Just as the City has installed special doors and spaces for handicapped people, the YMCA should provide an all-gender changing area as well as binary facilities to accommodate all patrons.”

Others joined her. And that’s when trans activities and their allies went to work and shut down “the naked old lady” herself.

And then Leftist thugs began roughing up other people in the crowd.

Looks like Port Townsend and its woke mayor will do nothing to help her. In fact the mayor supported efforts to shut up the feminist.

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How much will $2000 a month buy you in San Francisco’s rental market? Not much it turns out. KRON4 surveyed six counties to determine what $2000 per month will buy the average renter and concludes that you can’t secure a studio apartment for anything less than $2300. Those eau d’toilet scents are expensive.

The cheapest prices in the six counties were found in the Bakersfield area, where for $2000 you can rent a three bedroom, two bath, 1700-square-foot abode.

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And now, the breakdown.

 

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Activists believe that the homeless issue is a housing affordability issue because capitalism is inherently evil or something. Housing would be more affordable for many squatters if they spent their checks on housing instead of drugs.

All is not good in the ‘hood for Portland’s “All Good Northwest” homeless program.

The program moved Portland’s copious drug-addled street people into mini-housing pods at three “villages” around the Portland area. As usual, however, something has gone wrong. Pod-people paradise is either run by people who can’t count, or worse.

The non-governmental organization (NGO) that Multnomah County set up only last year to exclusively oversee its pod villages over-billed the county more than $550,000 (not a typo). And it took a special auditor’s report to spot the problem, not the lady tasked with counting the beans for the NGO.

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Willamette Week reported that the auditor got a tip and even woke Portland wouldn’t stand for the grift.

The report is particularly damning, the auditor said, because Multnomah County helped set up All Good Northwest just last year, and the Joint Office was its sole source of funding.

“All Good Northwest was essentially a county-funded startup,” the auditor said. “It did not exist as an operational organization until the Joint Office contracted with it to operate alternative shelter programs. Because of this, it did not have any established funding or cash flow to support operations. It appears that All Good Northwest’s overbilling errors stemmed, at least in part, from cash flow issues within the organization due to its 100% reliance on county funding.”

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Meantime, bring on the homeless camps! KGW TV reports that the city plans to plop a homeless village in an area already overwhelmed by squatters who have “scared” homeowners in the North Portland area so much that they’re selling their homes and moving to the ‘burbs.

Families living near the Peninsula Crossing Trail have complained for years about the out-of-control, drugged-up squatters living along the bike path and now they’re voting with their feet.

Real estate broker Lauren Iaquinta sees it first hand.

“I would say the migration to the suburbs, I’ve seen quite a bit in the last two years,” she said. “Most people don’t want to have to worry about if they can leave their car parked in their driveway overnight without maybe having it broken into. It’s a pretty testy subject.”

Portland hasn’t helped itself by legalizing hard drugs and making it impossible to get addicts off the streets, where they inevitably end up.

To sum up, in Portland, homeowners and taxpayers have less clout than the homeless druggies.

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This brings us to this sad tale of how far the City of Roses has fallen. The Defund the Police movement and their BLM avatar, District Attorney Mike Schmidt, don’t consider property crime a precursor to bigger crimes. This explains why the car theft rate has leaped by 59 percent compared to this time last year.

And now, we’re sorry to report that the local volunteer bookmobile has been stolen.

Christie Quinn started her volunteer program four years ago to help underserved communities. Then her 1999 van was stolen.

When the bookmobile vanished, Quinn found law enforcement’s response plodding.

…Quinn saw that she couldn’t file a police report online for vehicle theft, so she called the Police Bureau the morning she discovered the theft. She hung up after spending an hour on hold.

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After trying to get police to help, she just gave up hope of getting it back.

And that’s the problem. Issue by issue, theft by theft, riot by riot, broken promise by broken promise, people just lose hope. That’s why you don’t place your hope in government and retain as many freedoms as you can to act in accordance with your own values.

All is not lost, however. Here’s a pretty picture.

Until next time, West Coast, Messed Coasters™

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