Welcome to the Real World, Former Food Stampers

The Schumer Shutdown is doing more than showing us government waste; it's showing us the corruption of American culture. What we've known was behind the curtain the whole time is now on full display for all to see.

I wrote earlier this week about local spots stepping up to care for their neighbors in need, and the comments are fantastic. One of the lines that seemed to resonate with readers was "Little Sally loves popsicles! It's simple: pour orange juice into a paper cup, put a stick in the cup, put the cup in the freezer, wait two hours." The italics refer to welfare recipients who think it unfair that sweets and treats are not covered by SNAP benefits.

One commenter left the following response (emphasis is mine):

Having been one who came out of poverty and a broken home, I can tell you I didn't know how to boil water. I would not have even considered that I could make popsicles. My point is that these people have not learned the basic knowledge of self preservation. I learned over time but it took a couple of decades. Note, I have never been on welfare, supported myself and my family, however, it would have been much easier had I known how to boil water. :) I make an assumption that there are people on the internet teaching these basic life skills, actually they are survival skills, but many either aren't aware or they aren't interested.

This is what happens when we take these basic life skills out of schools. Cooking, gardening, food preservation, and basic butchery are, in fact, survival skills. Without this knowledge, is it any wonder people have this reaction to receiving a box of canned and dry goods?

EBT recipient COMPLAINS about the food she was given, because her food stamps haven’t come in..

The entitlement is ridiculous, get a job. pic.twitter.com/TDuyOX1NRU
— American AF 🇺🇸 (@iAnonPatriot) November 6, 2025

This anonymous recipient is being scolded for being ungrateful, and she is. Her lack of gratitude, though, likely comes from her pre-programmed setting: open a wrapper, access something ready-to-eat. It's possible the woman doesn't even own a can opener, baking dish, or large pot. Even if she did, we'd be right to wonder if she knew how to use any of it.

Welcome to the Real World, former food stampers! This is a place of discomfort and harsh truth. You will not like it here, nor will you easily fit in. You see, those of us who have been members of this club for a while know you need some creativity, elbow grease, and practice to feed your family from that box. Yes, we want you to assimilate because you absolutely can, but you need to drop the attitude, especially if you want help. Help, as in, I will guide you through the process but I won't do it for you. If my seven-year-old can accept those terms for his homework, you shouldn't have any problem.

Here is what I would do with that box:

Breakfasts

Peaches and cream oatmeal
Pancakes
Biscuits and gravy

Lunches

Peanut butter sandwich and fresh fruit
Tuna and bean salad
Three bean salad

Dinner

Southwestern macaroni bake
Green bean casserole
Green pea fritters

I can hear the wailing now. Can you? Ashley, I don't like any of that! Everyone knows you need cream of something soup for green bean casserole. OMG, canned tuna is so gross. Biscuits? Aren't those, like, really hard to make?

First off, we Real World lifers need to help folks understand that this is food assistance and not a restaurant. It's meant to make ends meet and fill in the gaps, not to take orders and provide every single thing. Recipients need to understand that they are expected to be active participants, which means buying staples like eggs, vegetables, and meat. It's up to us to teach them this because clearly no one else has.

Do we need to start donating oven mitts, measuring cups, and spatulas to food pantries? Maybe we should include recipe cards while we're at it, because it seems obvious that people can't use their iPhones to search "what to make with canned green beans." But, really, how far back do we need to go?

Friends, we are at a low point in American culture. Gone are the mainstays of our culinary heritage, like Grandma's chicken and dumplings. Instant chicken-flavored noodles in cups are in their place. As our president would say, "Sad!"

The Americans who expect full meals from government assistance are delusional, but I struggle to say it's their fault; they've been catered to (literally) for years. Take a look behind the curtain, but beware: The language is a bit much.

Please tell me this is satire. Holy totes.

"They saying I gotta work 20 hours a week. I'm not working for nobody. Get the f*ck out of here. This is what Americans' taxpayers work for. For us. They work for us. For me. They gotta help me. Help me feed my (f*cking kids)"

Wow.… pic.twitter.com/m4jKJ6Wrjp
— Sassafrass84 (@Sassafrass_84) October 31, 2025

Those of us who have been able to support ourselves know that hard choices must be made. Do you fill your entire tank or buy some celery, canned salmon, and cheese? Anyone who knows me well knows getting my nails done is the one thing I do for myself, but until the government opens and military paychecks return, there will be no nail salon for me. Again, "Sad!"

The Real World does not allow for everyone to have everything they want every time. Maybe people can lean on libraries instead of paid subscriptions. Nix $18 take-out pad thai and settle for $8 frozen kung pao something-or-another. When we are supporting ourselves, we cannot have it all.

Watters on affordability: The people who got women’s studies degrees who can’t get an entry level job—they need to not DoorDash $30 hamburgers instead… learn how to cook. pic.twitter.com/bMiMQrgcQ5
— Acyn (@Acyn) November 6, 2025

This is the hardest part for former food stampers to accept. They've been able to throw anything that tickles their fancy into their carts when the rest of us have to consider coupons and upcoming expenses. Folks who are used to getting food for free do not understand this concept. Other people are supposed to pay this bill, not them.

The Real World demands planning, sacrifice, and work. As soon as we understand the logical and financial deficit of our former food stamp neighbors, we are better able to offer grace. There isn't much they could have done to learn how to boil water if their parents didn't know how, if it wasn't taught in school, and if there wasn't even a need for it. Saving and budgeting money, making sauces and dressings from scratch, even changing their own tires or oil — none of this was ever demonstrated for them. Even things as easy as making (not buying) popsicles are a stretch.

The best piece of advice I can give a Former Food Stamper with zero cooking experience is this: Pick up a box of Hamburger Helper and a pound of ground meat. The directions are on the box. You can make a one-pot dinner in a few minutes, and it will taste okay. After that, experiment with flavors; add a can of tomatoes and green chilis or some chopped mushrooms; top with cottage cheese or French-fried onions; stir in a bag of frozen pearl onions or carrots.

I hate that food cable channels have stopped teaching people how to cook. I learned to cook by watching Alton Brown and Iron Chef in the early oughts. Yes, I made a ton of terrible meals before I got the hang of it. No, it was not easy, but it was totally worth it. You can make better-tasting, healthier food for pennies on the dollar. But first, there has to be a need to do so, and here we are.

I write this piece of commentary to help our PJ community get a glimpse of reason in an unreasonable situation. There are too many TikTok videos out there of the handout crowd gnashing teeth because the welfare well has dried up. They were too blind to see that the palace they called home was just a house of cards.

One of my favorite meals happens to be pretty low-cost: beans and greens. Collards are in season right now, but you can use any fresh green (cabbage, kale, escarole, spinach, turnip, mustard). Any can of beans will do, so don't feel like you have to go out and buy a specific type.

McCully's Beans & Greens

1 bunch fresh greens
1 can beans
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
Salt, pepper, and garlic powder
Apple cider vinegar

Wash and dry the greens. Remove any big stems and chop into bite-sized pieces.
Heat oil in skillet over medium heat. Add greens to skillet and turn greens with tongs until they start to wilt.
Add beans, liquid and all. Season with a pinch of pepper and garlic powder. Add a tablespoon of vinegar. Turn greens to coat.
Continue turning greens until desired doneness.
Taste for flavor and add a pinch of salt or splash of vinegar if needed.

You can serve this with cornbread, fried spam or bacon, or biscuits. It is a quick side for a grab-and-go rotisserie chicken. This meal is healthy, satisfying, and delicious. Did I mention it costs under $6 and can feed 2-4 people? Leftovers reheat well, too.

Being on welfare is not supposed to be comfortable. Being hungry is good motivation to get your act together and go to work. We will make it through this crazy time, hopefully with our sanity intact. A modicum of understanding that former food stampers, through no fault of their own, don't know how to live in the Real World will help us get by.

Just because the government is shut down doesn't mean that PJ Media is, too. For a limited time, we are offering 74% off our VIP Membership with the promo code POTUS47. Just like the Schumer Shutdown, this deal won't last forever, so take advantage of the steep discount today!