The party of Sam Brinton — the mustachioed cross-dressing luggage thief that Democrats trusted with the nation's nuclear waste — spent a day or two trying to convince the world that JD Vance was too "weird" to be vice president. Then they went and topped themselves (is that a genuine Lefty kink?) with the cringiest Zoom call ever.
Featuring celebrities you probably saw in movies no less than a decade ago, the #WhiteDudesForKamala Zoom call was billed as [feelings], and the New York Times was eager to play along, saying the group "showed the breadth of Democratic support for her candidacy."
Harris is black(ish), you see, so white dudes wouldn't normally vote for her because literally everything is racist. When a white dude votes for a black(ish) candidate, it's a world-shattering event. Also: Barack who?
The diversity was off the charts.
"The Lord of the Rings" supporting actor Sean Astin — most often seen these days on X — set the tone, explaining that the call was a chance to show "that men can gather to talk about how we feel." My old friend, Arizona Central columnist and undisputed king of stuff Jon Gabriel, put the proper dude spin on that message.
While I didn't attend the call myself, based on everything I've read and watched, "Iron Man" (2008) costar Jeff Bridges set the tone.
Mark Hamill, having completed his part in the effort to destroy Star Wars, was there, too.
The Zoom call started with an estimated 60,000 attendees which eventually grew to 160,000 or more before it was over. But since so much of the coverage on X came from conservatives mocking the attendees, I'd wager that a decent-sized fraction of the attendees weren't exactly there to show their support.
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And, dude, was there ever plenty to mock. Here's the organizer of the call, explaining how he's been thinking a lot lately about men and how he wishes we didn't have to be so manly — not that he's at much risk of that.
There's not one of my gay friends who couldn't beat up three of this guy. He is no dude.
Republican pollster Whit Ayres warned the BBC that it "backfires when you start attacking people because of their identity. Because everyone else who shares their identity feels like you're attacking them." And that's true enough, which is why last week I cautioned men against attacking Harris on her personal history. But as a bona fide white dude, my privilege extends to mocking these wanna-be white dudes.
So it's my bemused duty to assure you that #WhiteDudesForKamala is a thing, even though I was assured as recently as last week that referring to "the First Lady" by her first name was racist, sexist, and a leading cause of halitosis.
It's easy — maybe even vital — to laugh at these desperate attempts at being all cool and inclusive. But the #WhiteDudesForKamala call did end up raising $3.7 million for the Harris-[BLANK] campaign, and that's no laughing matter.
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