Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise #1: The President’s new jobs plan has somehow managed to leak the day before he was supposed to reveal it to Congress — and on the very day of the GOP debate he had tried to bigfoot.


Surprise #2: The President’s bold new jobs plan consists of… wait for it… wait for it… stimulus! Yes, that’s right: Stimulus. This time, however, the bold new stimulus consists of extended payroll tax breaks, extended unemployment benefits, shovel-ready infrastructure improvements, and maybe a small provision for a tax break for businesses hiring the unemployed.

Now, maybe you’re asking yourself exactly how this stimulus is different from the last stimulus, which featured payroll tax breaks, extended unemployment benefits, and shovel-ready infrastructure improvements. Well, mister, I’m happy to tell you that the last stimulus cost about $800,000,000,000 and this totally new and improved stimulus will only cost $300,000,000,000 (plus shipping & handling).

Such a deal!

Surprise #3: It’s the love for spending that dare not speak its name. There’s another stimulus plan out there that isn’t even a stimulus. And how will House Democrats manage that nifty feat? They’re not going to call it a stimulus! That’s right, they’ll say it’s “job creation” and “make it in America.” Don’t you want to kiss that pig with the shiny, red lipstick? I know I do!


So. The President has his $300,000,000,000 plan. House Speaker member Nancy Pelosi has her “Make it in America” plan, without a price tag on it yet. Neither plan has any plan for paying for either plan.

Which comes as no surprise at all.


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