The PJ Tatler

In Case You Thought the News Couldn't Get Any Worse...

Because the world is crying out for this one:

Alfred Hitchcock’s film The Birds told the story of a rustic seaside town that finds itself menaced by hellish flocks of seagulls and crows. Now the 1963 classic looks set to suffer its own form of molestation courtesy of a Hollywood remake by Transformers director Michael Bay.

Loosely adapted from a 1952 short story by Daphne du Maurier, The Birds cast Tippi Hedren in the role of Melanie Daniels, a San Francisco socialite who comes horribly unstuck on a visit to northern California. Reports suggest that Bay’s version will return to tale to its original English setting, while Naomi Watts is rumoured to be considering the Hedren role.

Variety reports that the film will be directed by the Dutch film-maker Diederik Van Rooijen, with Bay serving as a co-producer. The film looks set to be a co-production between Mandalay Pictures, Universal and Bay’s Platinum Dunes production house. It remains to be seen whether the birds will be giant, man-eating birds, or possibly armed with guns.

Bombs away!