The PJ Tatler

Magic Johnson Touts Government Healthcare to Help Him Out of Health Problems that Magic's Johnson Got Him Into

NBA legend Magic Johnson probably isn’t the ideal candidate to sell Obamacare. But that hasn’t stopped the Obama administration from enlisting him to sell its lousy, unpopular policy anyway.

JOHNSON: “Affordable healthcare is important to me because everybody deserves to have good healthcare. When you think about it, it saved my life, and I remember when I took my physical and they told me I had HIV, over 22 years ago. If it wasn’t for that quality healthcare that I had, and the plan that I have, I probably would have been dead. So I’m glad that I had a good coverage, a good plan, and also too, you never know when you’re going to need it. It’s very important.

That quality healthcare did not come from a government program. Some of the research leading to HIV treatment did, but as a multi-millionaire, Johnson can afford any health care he wants. He could hire a dozen doctors to tend to his every need and even fetch his coffee if he wants.

“Young people, they think they’re super man, like nothing is ever going to happen to them. But trust me, one day, something is going to happen, and you’re going to need a quality health plan. So make sure you get ObamaCare.

You increase the odds of something happening to you if you do what Magic Johnson did. He slept around, and around, and around, and around. Consequences followed.

“What athletes don’t understand, you’re going to get hurt, I don’t care who you are. Whether its little league, pee-wee league, all the way up to junior high school, college, and maybe in the pros if you’re fortunate enough to make it, you’re going to get injured.

Athletes can easily avoid the kind of injury that befelled Mr. Johnson, just by keeping their johnsons to themselves.

“In my second year with the Lakers, I tore my knee up. Torn cartilage; it was my first major injury. So, man, I didn’t know how having insurance and a great health plan would work. Well, I found out then. And so, I had to rehab, the had insurance paid for that, then all the doctors, the bills, it all piled up, but the insurance took care of that. And at the end of the day, I was happy that I had a good plan, and that I was able to come back and be the same type of player that I was before I was injured: Playing just like magic.

He was already a multi-millionaire. He could even afford the exorbitant Obamacare premiums and deductibles!

“No matter how rich, poor, middle class; no matter what color you are, everybody deserves to have good, quality healthcare. And what I’m really excited about is, every kid can go get their shots, get their physicals; parents can go get their physicals, because, see, early detection can save people’s lives. I’m living proof of that.”

Um, not really. Johnson is living proof that the Obama administration is using pitchmen to sell government snake oil.