The PJ Tatler

'Meeting You' Email in My Inbox Turns Out Not to be Spam from a Shady Foreign Dating Site

It’s an Obama campaign fundraising email from Bill Clinton.

Friend —

I’ve been in President Obama’s shoes before — less than six months to go before an election to let you finish what you started. It was tough enough back then, but this election is going to be tougher.

We’re facing a tidal wave of anonymous, unlimited spending. The other side has pledged to throw more than 1 billion dollars into tearing down our president.

It’s unprecedented.

Fortunately, so is the grassroots organization you’re building.

Pitch in what you can today to strengthen the campaign — and you’ll be automatically entered to join me and President Obama in New York City, with the campaign covering airfare and accommodations.

And if you’re a porn star, you may already be a winner!

Former President Bill Clinton, surrounded by porn stars, at a Monte Carlo casino last night.

If our opponent succeeds, so much of what we’ve fought so hard for will be rolled back. Health care reform — which many presidents, including me, tried to pass and couldn’t — will be gone. Same goes for the opportunity for millions more Americans to afford to go to college, and a growing economy that works for middle-class families.

Our opponent is actually advertising a more extreme version of the policies that got us in trouble in the first place: policies that will leave us with more debt, weaker regulations on risky investments, and fewer jobs.

All of that’s at stake between now and November, but here’s why I’m feeling good about our chances: I know people like you have the President’s back.

That’s not the only reason Bill’s feelin’ good, ifyaknowwhatimeanandithinkyado. He’s spending quality time with “Best New Starlet” Brooklyn Lee, star of titles like Farm Girls Gone Bad and Sexual Messiah 1. Lee is the redhead in the blue dress on the right, wrapped tightly in the impeached president’s arm. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, back in Washington, could not be reached for comment. Not that Bill tried to reach her.

And I can’t wait to meet you. I hope you’ll give it a shot:

I’m not touching that.

Thanks, and good luck,

Bill Clinton

Keep is classy, Barack. Keep it classy.