The PJ Tatler

Mad Mike Williamson's New Book Proposal

Michael Z. Williamson, the author of the great Freehold series for Baen, also has a blog, called “Speaker to Morons.

Williamson has a sharp wit and biting sense of humor and a few thoughts on a new book proposal.

Mike: I have this awesome idea for a satirical story.

Publisher: Go on.

Mike: We’ll have a protest against capitalism and banks.

Publisher: It’s been done.

Mike: Yes, but this will be different. The protesters will protest capitalism, while wearing clothing made in sweatshops, AND, one of the sweatshop shirts from Honduras will bear the image of a communist who was shot for leading too many failed revolutions.

But there’s more. They’ll adopt as their emblem this it’s the image of a jihadist who tried to overthrow a parliamentary government to instill a religious dictatorship. The image is owned by Warner, a huge media conglomerate that earns $12 billion a year. They used it for a movie about a terrorist, and they get 30% of every sale of the mask to these protesters. Plus! It’s made in a sweatshop in China by dissident prison laborers on starvation rations, using potentially toxic chemicals.

Publisher: …um…

Mike: No, wait! This is satire, okay? Hippie drummers will show up at the protest, and the protesters will tax them on their tips to help fund the revolution. They’ll have a “consensus” on doing so, without asking the drummers—taxation without representation! And they’ll insist the drummers stop drumming because it’s annoying, but still want them to get tips!

Then, when they actually get donations, they’ll take them to one of the banks they’re protesting.

Also, in a survey, half of them will actually support taxpayer-funded bailouts of banks.

When violence happens, they’ll blame it on a “right wing conspiracy.” They’ll want people to believe conservatives and Christians are sending people in to have sex in public, defecate in public and smoke dope.

After it really gets rolling, they’ll get endorsement by the Communist AND Nazi Parties both.

They’ll also meet at Starbuck’s and drink overpriced coffee, and…

Publisher: Stop. Just stop. Satire works because it’s believable. This is just insane. Even Monty Python makes more sense than this.

Mike, stop bashing Python! The killer rabbit wasn’t satire, ask Jimmy Carter!