The Morning Briefing: Nobody Knows Anything and That's Half the Fun

Top O' the Briefing

Happy Tuesday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends.

I hope everyone is having a somewhat enjoyable start to the New Year.

Today is another "Holiday Lite" edition, then we will return to our regularly scheduled news with a heavy side of snark tomorrow.

I've been writing professionally about politics for over 20 years and this year will mark my 40th anniversary as an activist. Many of you are probably now thinking, "But Kruiser, you're only 38!"

That's all genetics.

Anyway, I mention my years of experience as a starting point for the discussion about how weird 2024 is going to be here in the United States of America. Conventional political wisdom went missing in 2016 and hasn't been seen since. Here is the one prediction I will make: it won't be found in 2024.

I will freely admit that, despite my decades of political experience, I haven't the slightest clue what is going to happen this year. Because the year is fresh and I'm feeling generous, I'll just say that I'm skeptical of anyone who speaks or writes as if he or she has some keen insight as to how the presidential election is going to play out. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if we end up with a hybrid sloth/ptarmigan being from a faraway galaxy ruling the United States, if not all of Earth, at this time next year.

For reasons I will have to explore in therapy and with a bartender, I'm convinced that the sloth/ptarmigan space alien speaks through what appears to be an armpit.

Not being certain doesn't prevent me from speculating though. It's part of the gig here. I will be thinking things through, but there will be occasional fits of throwing everything at the wall just to see what sticks.

I have adobe walls. They're very easy to clean.

Let the flinging begin.

Click the button below to get the Morning Briefing emailed to you every weekday. Have your coffee with me, people. It's free and it supports conservative media!

The Mailbag of Magnificence contributions can be sent to [email protected].

Everything Isn't Awful

Dog and pig playing with a ball.. 😊 pic.twitter.com/SBsEi4uhGq
— Buitengebieden (@buitengebieden) January 1, 2024

PJ Media

Only Fitting: Biden Resolutions Shown Next to a Ball Being Dropped

There Was a Time When Governments Tried to Make Their People Better

Yikes! Biden’s Brain Misfires Spectacularly During New Year's Eve Times Square Appearance

Christianity Today Wades Into Dangerous Waters With Pronoun Discussion

'Missing' Melania Stories Confirm Pundit's Advice: Former First Lady Is Key to Trump Win in 2024

Townhall Mothership

Schlichter. Top Twenty Terrible Predictions for 2024

The Ending of Cowboys-Lions Game Sparks Outrage and Accusations That Refs Fixed the Game

New Year, Same Old Ninth Circuit

Happy New Year to All of Our Readers!

WATCH: Female Influencer Visits Gym in Painted Pants, Gets Reaction She Deserves After Playing the Victim

Monday Morning Meme Madness

VIP

Become part of the PJ Media VIP party by subscribing here. Use promo code KRUISERMB to receive a 25% discount. Trust me, we’re having fun over here.

What Does 2024 Have in Store for Us? Here Are Some Predictions

Around the Interwebz

Taylor Swift Passes Elvis For Most Weeks At No. 1 On Album Charts For A Solo Artist

AI-created “virtual influencers” are stealing business from humans

2023 Was a Year Full of Mysteries

Bee Me

Father Buys 800 AA Batteries So He'll Never Have To Buy More For A Long --- UPDATE: They're All Gone https://t.co/BIesoy6FEB pic.twitter.com/BQLgKON8w6
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) January 1, 2024