“We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We can make him better than he was. Better… stronger… faster.” —TV’s “The Six Million Dollar Man”
If you haven’t been paying attention to the chatbot AI revolution, then shame on you. Without even an iota of hyperbole, it’s the most significant – as well as the coolest – technological advancement since the invention of the World Wide Web in 1989. Don’t dismiss it as “spellcheck on steroids” or a cheap, inconsequential, word-generating party trick; this is huge. It’ll go down in history as one of humanity’s most consequential inventions.
Just a few hundred years ago, the Industrial Revolution began. Machines of increased complexity, coupled with advances in human logistics (including the assembly line) empowered us to build our modern world from the bottom up. And within just a few lifetimes, we went from mules and plowshares to Lamborghinis and high-rises. By every conceivable metric, the Industrial Revolution altered the course of our civilization. It was the biggest agent of societal change since the discovery of agriculture 10,000 years ago… until now.
Because, with the chatbot revolution, we’re at the cusp of a new age – an Intellectual Revolution – where intellect itself is mass-produced, mass-utilized, and instantly accessible to anyone with an Internet connection. We’re not that far away from an app on your phone being your doctor, your lawyer, your accountant, your marketing director, your receptionist, your personal trainer, your therapist, your career planner, your dietician, and your tutor.
If you thought the Industrial Revolution was significant, just wait ‘til you see the Intellectual Revolution.
We always want to analogize new things with old things: “The Internet is kinda like TV or the newspaper” or “Social media is kinda like party lines” or “Chatbots are just an improved version of predictive text” – even when, in truth, they’re radically different from everything that preceded it. But that’s how our brain works: We need a measuring stick.
Without it, we’re lost.
And so, we struggle to find a suitable comparison for today’s AI because there’s never been anything like this on planet Earth: We’ve literally built a machine that’s capable of intelligent thought. They’re already generating novel solutions to difficult problems. Assuming this technology is scalable, what’s coming through the pipelines will disrupt nearly every industry.
We already have AIs that can replicate voices. We also have AIs that can capture the appearance of people in original, photorealistic videos. And we’re just starting to create AIs that mimic the speech patterns, thought processes, and conversational styles of their subjects. Character.AI is one of many where you can “chat” with AI versions of Napoleon Bonaparte, Julius Caesar, Abraham Lincoln, Ben Franklin, and Alexander the Great… as well as AI versions of Jesus Christ, Buddha, Satan, L. Ron Hubbard, and even God Himself.
Actress Scarlett Johansson threatened legal action when Chat GPT “stole” her voice for one of its chatbots, and the estate of the late George Carlin went on the legal warpath when comedians used AI to create a “new” George Carlin comedy special. (Before it was stricken from the ‘Net, I listened to AI Carlin. Full disclosure: I love George Carlin, have seen him live, and consider him the greatest standup of all time. And this new concert was… pretty good. Not on the level of Carlin’s most beloved work, but it was shockingly effective. And *chef’s kiss* for AI George’s line about how screwed 7-11 would’ve been if September 11 came two months earlier.)
George Carlin had an extraordinarily long career, but in terms of total content, it’s minuscule compared to Limbaugh’s. For decades at a time, El Rushbo was broadcasting three hours a day, five days a week. Entire catalogs exist of Rush Limbaugh’s shows, which his estate still owns. Chatbots need data to train on; with Limbaugh, they’d have all the data they need – and then some.
So, it’s technologically possible to turn the EIB Network into the “AI” B Network.
The question is, would you listen?
Admittedly, it wouldn’t be the same as if he were still alive. And yes, there’s something creepy about resurrecting Rush and artificially putting words in his mouth.
But this is where the technology is heading.
In a few years, you’ll be able to plug in the names of countless celebrities – living and dead – and make them sing brand-new songs, appear in videos, or create original content. There are already countless videos on YouTube of dead musicians – including Johnny Cash, Elvis Presley, John Lennon, and Frank Sinatra – singing songs they never actually sang.
Sometimes, the amateur-level AI adaptations are lousy. But not always. Sometimes, it’s shockingly beautiful… and the technology is going to keep getting better and better. Right now, this is the worst it’s ever going to be.
The first iPhone was truly groundbreaking, but it also lacked an App Store, couldn’t copy and paste, couldn’t text in landscape mode, couldn’t text photos, lacked maps or driving apps, no Siri, no GPS, couldn’t film videos, no front camera, and only had a 2 megapixel back camera. When compared to a dirt-cheap, discount smartphone today, the original iPhone was garbage.
But it was a harbinger of what was coming.
As are today’s chatbots.
In theory, it’d be wonderful for Rush Limbaugh to rise from the ashes and thrill his dittoheads one last time. And his fans would be beyond thrilled to hear his voice again – listening to his spin on Kamala Harris, the 2024 campaign, and the craziness of the world – and share the Limbaugh experience with our children and grandchildren. An AI version of Rush, done right, would be the ultimate tribute to America’s Truth Detector, our Doctor of Democracy, and America’s Anchorman: An ongoing legacy that continues to educate “young skulls full of mush” and promote the conservative beliefs that defined him.
So as a fan, I’d loooove it if the EIB Network became the “AI” B Network and Rush roared again. His absence still hurts; the vacuum he left was never filled.
But as a fan, I also suspect he wouldn’t support it.
Rush Limbaugh would want us to think for ourselves. Rather than being pleased that we’re still turning to him for guidance, I think he’d be saddened. Rush championed the conservative principles of rugged individualism and self-determination, and asking an algorithm to speak for him – or think for us – is antithetical to the Limbaugh ethos.
“My point is, don’t worry about AI, don’t worry about Siri taking control of your car and driving you off a cliff,” advised Rush, in one of his final broadcasts. “Don’t worry about any of that. Worry about the artificial intelligence, the artificial education, and the mind-numbed robots that American education is creating today.”
Rush Limbaugh might be gone, but he left us with all the knowledge and all the tools. He might not be lecturing any more, but the Limbaugh Institute for Advanced Conservative Studies still stands.
Now, it’s our turn to do the teaching.
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